Why are our brains wired this way?

[Teensy1]

Beautifully said. I did not become a cuckold until I was 72 after medication made me permanently soft and my wife and I agreed that she should have the option of fucking other men. She says she now wishes that she had been a hotwife all along. All of her friends are and their hubbies seem quite content not only being cucks but also being pussyfree. Most of them, including me, now have sex with men and find it quite satisfying.

[cuckling]

very interesting thread this

[Dream Weaver]

From what I've heard/read it's a lot biological: A man feels the urge to conquer a (his) woman and prove he is the best partner when she's had sex with others. It's like sperm competition. The man wants to prove his sperm is the best, compared to other seed.
So all this talk of cuckolds being weak is in fact the opposite. But then again, no situation/relationship is identical so there will always be some differences

I always have been dubious of the theory. It merely explained guys taking other "claimed" women. It might explain a cuckold getting turned on after having been cheated on, but I see no "strength" in that at all. It's nature setting a guy up to stick with his cheating mate.

Of course we are humans and turn it into sex games. It's all good. But to claim we are strong? I wish. LOL.

[cuckling]

From what I've heard/read it's a lot biological: A man feels the urge to conquer a (his) woman and prove he is the best partner when she's had sex with others. It's like sperm competition. The man wants to prove his sperm is the best, compared to other seed.
So all this talk of cuckolds being weak is in fact the opposite. But then again, no situation/relationship is identical so there will always be some differences

I always have been dubious of the theory. It merely explained guys taking other "claimed" women. It might explain a cuckold getting turned on after having been cheated on, but I see no "strength" in that at all. It's nature setting a guy up to stick with his cheating mate.

Of course we are humans and turn it into sex games. It's all good. But to claim we are strong? I wish. LOL.

Dont' think there are common rules that apply to all: sure there are 'weak' cuckolds but there are strong ones too.. Just like most cucks have small dicks but some will have big ones.

[trecital]

From what I've heard/read it's a lot biological: A man feels the urge to conquer a (his) woman and prove he is the best partner when she's had sex with others. It's like sperm competition. The man wants to prove his sperm is the best, compared to other seed.

This is just too simplistic an explanation, in my view.
How do you 'prove' that one man's sperm is 'the best'?
How do you define 'best'? Most successful at getting a woman pregnant? Perhaps his sperm is more likely to pass on certain poor genes? The questions are endless, and the idea is ultimately unprovable. Which is perhaps why people like to keep repeating it.

[cuckling]

trecital you need to read this in the Stone Age time not like in modern era. The best is not defined it's an expression.

[trecital]

trecital you need to read this in the Stone Age time not like in modern era. The best is not defined it's an expression.

But we aren't living in the stone age.....

[Bartleby]

Do any of you cucks reflect on why your psychology is the way it is?

I have a background in neuroscience and I believe its probably like a lot of things. There's likely a genetic predisposition to becoming this way IF the right experiences occur at the right time. I've spent a lot of time analyzing myself and reflecting on my past and I think I have the incident my cuck brain was born nailed down.

I was 19 and a virgin. I was very ashamed of this because all of my friends were sexually active and I pretended I was experienced. I had a girlfriend several years younger than me who was in my circle of friends. She was the cool girl who preferred to hang out with us guys and was into everything we were into. I wanted to have sex with her so bad, but she kept denying me saying that she wanted to stay a "born again" virgin after having a few sexual experiences when she was 14-15 years old.

One of our friends, Ryan was like the alpha of the group. A bad boy who had run away at 17 and secured an apartment on the main floor of a house some foolish landlord rented out to him. That became our primary hangout pad to drink, play music, do drugs, bad teenage fun in the 90s.

My girlfriend ended up breaking up with me because she lost interest in me in that way, but we were still best friends and hung out every day. I was madly in love with her and most people thought we were still together. I liked to pretend we were.

Anyways, one night at a party she and Ryan went missing. I asked a girlfriend of hers where she went and she just smiled and said "I don't think you want to know". Another guy later in the night told me they've been fucking in the van outside for hours and hours! I was SO devastated. I just left and walked back to my house even though it was over 6 miles (10 km) away and took hours to walk home. I just cried and cried.

I later found out that she went over there all the time on her spare periods in high school and they often had sex in the shower together. They weren't romantically involved at all, in fact, he had a girlfriend who didn't know about this. They just did it for fun. I had a really hard time getting over this girl and I stayed a virgin for quite a while afterwards, not losing my virginity until my second year of university when I got a new girlfriend.

So that's my past which led to my brain becoming wired to find it SO HOT to have the woman I love more than anything be fucked silly by a bigger, more dominant man. Does anyone else have a cuck brain origin story to share?

I think I am very much like you. I have elaborated on a thread I made quite recently.

The pattern is similar: I have always been envious of the boys who started fucking when they were teenagers and had a lot of girlfriends when I had none. This envy lasts until today. The interesting thing is that this envy one day turned to admiration and wanting to be fucked by such males myself and wanting them to fuck my wife.

I can totally relate to your story. That would have been heartbreaking. Quite understandable that this humiliation needs to get relieved somehow and that relief can come in a reversal: You want the thing to happen that hurt yoy so much. You can win over the pain by redefining it to be pleasure.

[Bluetoed]

From what I've heard/read it's a lot biological: A man feels the urge to conquer a (his) woman and prove he is the best partner when she's had sex with others. It's like sperm competition. The man wants to prove his sperm is the best, compared to other seed.
So all this talk of cuckolds being weak is in fact the opposite. But then again, no situation/relationship is identical so there will always be some differences

I always have been dubious of the theory. It merely explained guys taking other "claimed" women. It might explain a cuckold getting turned on after having been cheated on, but I see no "strength" in that at all. It's nature setting a guy up to stick with his cheating mate.

Of course we are humans and turn it into sex games. It's all good. But to claim we are strong? I wish. LOL.

Things that turn a man on typically result in him having more sex and more sperm released from each orgasm. More sperm being released into a woman increases the odds of fertilization.

Assuming that there is a cuckold gene, that gene results in more sperm being released into women, increasing the odds of fertilization. That would make the gene a dominant gene.

A recessive gene on the other hand would be, say, a gene that makes a man homosexual. This gene would not result in more sperm being released into a woman, so not only does it not increase the odds of fertilization, it most likely decreases the odds significantly.

I believe there are significantly more men that have the hotwife/cuckold gene than men that have the homosexual gene. But gays have come out of the closet, whereas most hotwife/cuckolds either have not come out of the closet (even to their own wives), haven't realized they are one yet, or have wives who won't do it.

[athlete915]

My big issue with the sperm competition theory is that at least in my experience, the cuckolds aren't racing to sleep with their wives when I am done. They're more than content to have enjoyed watching her pleasure and getting themselves off.

[Bluetoed]

My big issue with the sperm competition theory is that at least in my experience, the cuckolds aren't racing to sleep with their wives when I am done. They're more than content to have enjoyed watching her pleasure and getting themselves off.

Yeah, if there is a "pussy free" gene, then that would totally be a recessive gene.

It would be interesting to see a study that asked all hotwife husbands if they like being "pussy free", and if so, how often?

[cuckling]

We dont live in the stone age but some behavior can still be traced back to early ages. Why are some men better than other in survival skills? We dont need them these days but that's still something evolved from the times where those skills did matter.
Anyway, there is no clear conclusion to this matter.

[Cuckyboy3]

I think it’s a coping mechanism. Mind fetishizes cuckolding as a positive alternative to being rejected by the female. It allows the cuck to retain a role in the relationship (albeit non sexual), ensure that the wife is happy, and revel in his emasculation instead of suffering in it.

[Caribwaters]

I cannot recall an early or adolescences experience that might have triggered the need to be a cuck.. I have had the fantasy of a GF getting involved with another guy going back to a few years prior to my 1st real relationship in my mid teens. This girl who was a year older refused for months to allow me to even touch her intimately, but once she opened up, she really couldn't get enough. We enjoyed mutual oral nearly everyday when in high school. Intercourse was not going to be an option, but who cared.
She was working in the office for a company and her immediate boss, who was older and married displayed interest in her. She was initially afraid that I would be upset over the situation when she told me he wanted to take her out after work for a couple of drinks. I calmly told her she should take advantage of his offer. She then asked, what if he wants to kiss me? Responded, that would be your decision, as i would not be there. Couple of days later she accepted his persistent invitation and they went out the next day after work.
Knowing they were together on a "date" drove me crazy with angst, a feeling that I never experienced before. Didn't see or talk with her until the next afternoon, when I picked her up. We had a bite to eat and then went parking in a remote are we visited often. She told me after a number (?) of beers and a burger, he had taken her to another remote area when she said they started passionate kissing, that led to her being completely naked and then they engaged in oral to completion.
She had been expecting, with great dread that with her revelation as to how far they went in the car, I would flip out. Stunned when I told her, I understood the temptation under the effect of alcohol and I was OK with it. Asked her if she had any regrets and after awhile she said, No.
A few weeks later she had another intimate experience with another married co=worker from the same business, that continued off/on for a few months. I was hooked.

[jw_kk]

I’ve psychoanalyzed myself, in a deeply introspective manner over the last 45 years or so, on this topic.

In context, my first lover was a married woman, cheater/cuckoldress, almost twenty years my senior. Lois was dominant, kinky, experienced, and very much in control of me at that time - I was slavishly devoted to her, in love with her, obsessed with her sexually, and wholly submissive to her every desire, every demand.

That relationship ended unexpectedly - very traumatic for me emotionally, Lois disappeared from my life due to a series of events and move to a distant city. I craved her, suffered at the loss of her both physically and mentally.


My next lover, Paula, was age-appropriate. A devout, ‘good’ Catholic girl, she suffered from various emotional conflicts rooted in religion and sex. I definitely had a crush on her, if not true love. Sexually, we explored everything except vaginal penetration - rooted in her religion, Paula would not use any form of birth control, but she was always totally horny. Instead of penetrating sex, we enjoyed touching, oral, and eventually anal sex - Paula offered me her ass as an alternative to avoid pregnancy risk. To my shock, one summer day, just before the Memorial Day holiday, Paula broke up with me.

I was devastated, completely traumatized by the event. I nearly drank myself into a coma over the break-up. Later I found out Paula had been seeing a guy, Andy, behind my back. To add insult to injury, I was told by several close friends that Paula and Andy had been fucking (with condoms).

The final, probable formative “keystone” series of events took place with KK (now wife of 40+ years) when we were dating, then engaged.

I’ve written about those events in depth before, and published much of it on Literotica to memorialize it all. Basically KK ended our engagement unexpectedly. In the moment, I thought everything was fine, that we were on track to get married as planned. She had other ideas, other needs. Including lots of sexual exploration.

So, another emotional trauma - KK breaking off our engagement devastated me. It also had other dark, perverse effects on me. I reached a point soon after the break up where the only way I could get hard, orgasm, and cum, was thinking about KK fucking some other guy. It became an obsession, later further fueled by a letter I read in Penthouse Forum.

In all three formative cases, there are common elements:

- the emotional trauma, including the pain of loss
- the shame and humiliation because of rumor, innuendo
- the physical, sexual withdrawal
- the constant sexual craving and obsession, recall of sexual encounters and memories

KK continued to cheat, for some twenty years after we got married. From time to time, I experienced feelings of shame, guilt, humiliation, anger, and jealousy - I chose not to confront her over her infidelity, instead it fed my perverse desire to experience, see, know that KK was fucking other men - many men.

When we finally transitioned to the hot wife thing (we just celebrated our 22nd hot wife anniversary) it was like a huge relief. The shame, guilt and all the negative stuff vaporized.

[woodfellow]

I'll go with a simple explanation: The Madonna/Whore dichotomy. Madonna/Whore describes the two aspects of feminine behavior that men find attractive, corresponding to chastity/loyalty and promiscuity/sexuality respectively. There are biological reasons why men are attracted to these behaviors. In most cases men pursue these traits with different women: Tinder hookups for hot sex, and then "wife material" for long-term relationships.

A hotwife wife or girlfriend uniquely can scratch every itch at once. She is a loving and loyal partner and mother, while at the same time being a slut by pursuing sex with other men (what better demonstration of her sluttiness?). All of this is played out in a "safe" way: Hotwives don't often get pregnant with their extramarital lovers, or run off with them. So within that safe context this lets a man have his cake and eat it too. The Madonna and the Whore all in one woman.

Some fraction of men into cuckolding also have bisexual leanings, or at least curiosity in that direction. For some that might be a big factor ("servicing" the bull, eating his cum, etc.) although I don't believe it is for most.

[ahboom]

I never had thoughts about cuckoldry until my best friend came over one night. He playfully dry humped my young wife on the guest bed and we all laughed. Then I realized that I had an erection. I knew then that I was destined to wear horns.

Curious to know how it came about in the first place that he was dry humping your wife lol

[Teensy1]

They’d known each other for a good while. He had been divorced for several months and hadn’t had sex since. When my wife hugged and kissed him hello his natural response licked in. My wife laughed and observed that he must really be horny. That’s when he playfully pushed her onto the bed and began dry himping her. We all giggled and it ended there. But wifey later told me that her natural response had kicked in, too, Her nipples were stiff and her cunt was sopping wet. My friend had a huge erection and she could feel it pressing against her. She noticed that I was hard, too. I told her that watching her with her legs around him had excited me and that I was on the verge of masturbating in front of them. She was incredibly horny that night and had several loud orgasms when I ate her. When she went into the guest room to make the bed she noticed that the sheet was soaked with semen. As far as I know she never did fuck him. But i wish she had.

[Carlbiinchicago]

I think for me part of it is being bisexual
Part of it is the 3 way fantasies and the eventual 3 ways i had

And another part is how i alternate between feeling masculine and feminine. Sometimes i felt my wife deserved a more masculine guy and the hotwife fantasy kept getting stronger for me

Sadly it didnt work out the way i wanted.

[dinoo]

My wife and I talked a lot about it.
Finally she said to me:
"It seems almost impossible to explain. So let us enjoy what we both like."

[Cuck4Life]

The first time I knew this was a turn for me was reading Penthouse Variations stories of wife watching.One thing i noticed was i was only turned on if the stories were about wives and not girlfriends. For me at least there had to be an emotional attachment to experience the full dynamic. It was my beginning an eventually would lead to be becoming a cuckold, I would not change even if I could.

[hotfreaks]

When I was in my early teens, I came across penthouse letters. I read about husband's that got off on watching their wives fuck other men. I was extremely turned on by it. I think being that young and developing....the seed was planted. I kept these desires dormant and to myself until I began dating my wife.

I was the other man when we first started hooking up. We were both very young, and she had had a long term boyfriend. I knee on the days I could not see her that she was fucking him, and it triggered those penthouse letter stories, and turned me on so much. She eventually broke up with him and we began dating. Soon after I felt comfortable enough to express my fantasies to her. Not long after that, she started fucking other men, and that has been the way our whole relationship

[manmuscle]

I'll put basic biology on the table. Remove the construct of marriage. Remove the long term requirements and energy to raise another human.

When the female wants to breed, it is a HUGE turn on for the male. The pheromones and visual cues drive the male to want her badly.

The best way to insure diversity and successful reproduction is for the female to mate with multiple males. If you want to be the one that wins, then removing the other male's sperm (eating creampie, reclaiming sex, and the shape of the penis head) are how a male is the last man standing.

It is so hot for a woman to want the man muscle and want to be filled with cum. It is really natural for the man to enjoy her desires.

Now, add the construct of marriage back in and the need to put a lot of energy and time into raising another human. The result is a relationship that enjoys her natural desires and everyone is open about the sexual pleasure. Or, you can use labels like cuckolding, hot wifing, poly, stag/vixen, etc....

Ultimately, it is natural for these desires. Stop over thinking it and enjoy the ride!

[Melodia1330]

Thanks for your thoughtful contribution to this discussion SheLikesWhenIWatch. I would love to check out that list of cuckold themes in literature and film.

[trecital]

Stop over thinking it and enjoy the ride!

You make a statement that, in my opinion, is overthinking it. And then say "stop overthinking it".