Disadvantages of starting too early?

[toreaddave]

Does anyone have any thoughts on whether introducing cuckolding too early on in the relationship could be disadvantageous? For example, does cuckolding lose most of its appeal if the two of you haven't even had enough time to develop deep feelings for each other? With that said, when do you think is the ideal time to introduce it?

[canadianwittol]

I confessed my desires early, but my wife steadfastly refused to indulge them until after we were married.

While we dated, she would tell me about past hook-ups, tease me, taunt me that she was going to cuckold me, but didn't actually do it.

After we got married we discussed it for a few more weeks as she wanted to be sure that I was sure.

47 days later I was a true cuckold.

[toreaddave]

I confessed my desires early, but my wife steadfastly refused to indulge them until after we were married.

While we dated, she would tell me about past hook-ups, tease me, taunt me that she was going to cuckold me, but didn't actually do it.

After we got married we discussed it for a few more weeks as she wanted to be sure that I was sure.

47 days later I was a true cuckold.

Thanks for sharing! Was the only reason she didn't indulge before marriage was to make sure that you were sure? It seemed like she herself was already on board with all the teasing and taunting and with how soon after marriage it happened.

[Cdncuck]

People have different ideas about when to introduce the idea of cuckolding. In our case, I brought it up fairly in the relationship when we were dating. The reason was I believed it was important she knew about my feelings, that they were part of me and they weren't going away. It also gave her the opportunity to walk away if that was what she wanted.

I expected her response to be negative. This was many years ago. Neither of us had ever heard the words cuckold or hotwife. I wanted to marry a woman who slept with other men. It was as simple as that.

Much to my surprise the idea aroused and intrigued her from the first time I suggested it. We talked about it off and on for a couple of months and one night she told me it was something she wanted to try. A couple of weeks later we had our first mfm and she's been seeing other men ever since.

[isinlarsa]

It happened to me twice -- during my first and second marriages. Both times it was my wife who made the decision to cuckold me, and both times is was well into the marriage; 8 years in my first marriage and 16 years after my second.

My first wife cheated on me, and only told me after she had been getting fucked by a co-worker. I had never heard of the word "cuckold" back then, but discovered it excited me for other men to fuck my wife. The reason for our divorce had nothing to do with our sex lives.

My second wife knew of my background, but never expressed any interest in being a hot wife -- until her mid-40s. She knew she had a free pass if she wanted one. So it was just a matter of her telling me that she planned on dating other men. She even had me pick up the picture to go on her internet ad advertising that she was a married woman seeking to date.

[toreaddave]

People have different ideas about when to introduce the idea of cuckolding. In our case, I brought it up fairly in the relationship when we were dating. The reason was I believed it was important she knew about my feelings, that they were part of me and they weren't going away. It also gave her the opportunity to walk away if that was what she wanted.

I expected her response to be negative. This was many years ago. Neither of us had ever heard the words cuckold or hotwife. I wanted to marry a woman who slept with other men. It was as simple as that.

Much to my surprise the idea aroused and intrigued her from the first time I suggested it. We talked about it off and on for a couple of months and one night she told me it was something she wanted to try. A couple of weeks later we had our first mfm and she's been seeing other men ever since.

Thanks for sharing! I like the idea of introducing it early so she has a chance to walk away if it's definitely not something she wants. That way, no one's time gets wasted.

[toreaddave]

It happened to me twice -- during my first and second marriages. Both times it was my wife who made the decision to cuckold me, and both times is was well into the marriage; 8 years in my first marriage and 16 years after my second.

My first wife cheated on me, and only told me after she had been getting fucked by a co-worker. I had never heard of the word "cuckold" back then, but discovered it excited me for other men to fuck my wife. The reason for our divorce had nothing to do with our sex lives.

My second wife knew of my background, but never expressed any interest in being a hot wife -- until her mid-40s. She knew she had a free pass if she wanted one. So it was just a matter of her telling me that she planned on dating other men. She even had me pick up the picture to go on her internet ad advertising that she was a married woman seeking to date.

Thanks for sharing! Interesting that you discovered you enjoyed it only after being cuckolded. For your second wife, you said she knew about your background. So did you tell her early on that you enjoyed cuckolding?

[isinlarsa]

It happened to me twice -- during my first and second marriages. Both times it was my wife who made the decision to cuckold me, and both times is was well into the marriage; 8 years in my first marriage and 16 years after my second.

My first wife cheated on me, and only told me after she had been getting fucked by a co-worker. I had never heard of the word "cuckold" back then, but discovered it excited me for other men to fuck my wife. The reason for our divorce had nothing to do with our sex lives.

My second wife knew of my background, but never expressed any interest in being a hot wife -- until her mid-40s. She knew she had a free pass if she wanted one. So it was just a matter of her telling me that she planned on dating other men. She even had me pick up the picture to go on her internet ad advertising that she was a married woman seeking to date.

Thanks for sharing! Interesting that you discovered you enjoyed it only after being cuckolded. For your second wife, you said she knew about your background. So did you tell her early on that you enjoyed cuckolding?

I had never heard of cuckolding, although she and I had tried wife swapping, so she knew she liked new dicks in her cunt. When we were swapping, my thoughts were on fucking the other wife; although I did find it titillated me when she talked about how the other husband fucked her. Perhaps that planted the seed. I had no idea that I could be turned on by my wife getting fucked by other men until it happened; and I had no idea what being cuckolded was.

When she confessed to me that she was getting fucked at work (she and her co-worker were alone in the office in the afternoons) and had actually made me eat her out with his cum still in her cunt, I discovered it excited me as much as if I had fucked her myself.

[isinlarsa]

It happened to me twice -- during my first and second marriages. Both times it was my wife who made the decision to cuckold me, and both times is was well into the marriage; 8 years in my first marriage and 16 years after my second.

My first wife cheated on me, and only told me after she had been getting fucked by a co-worker. I had never heard of the word "cuckold" back then, but discovered it excited me for other men to fuck my wife. The reason for our divorce had nothing to do with our sex lives.

My second wife knew of my background, but never expressed any interest in being a hot wife -- until her mid-40s. She knew she had a free pass if she wanted one. So it was just a matter of her telling me that she planned on dating other men. She even had me pick up the picture to go on her internet ad advertising that she was a married woman seeking to date.

Thanks for sharing! Interesting that you discovered you enjoyed it only after being cuckolded. For your second wife, you said she knew about your background. So did you tell her early on that you enjoyed cuckolding?

I gave you the background of how I came to finding out the thrill of being cuckold, but I didn't really answer your question.

Even when we were dating, I told my future wife that I had been involved in several swinging relationships and, if she wanted, she could continue to see other men. Even though she had been rather promiscuous while single, and (for a short time) she continued to be fucked by another man when we started dating; she indicated she had no desire for an open marriage, even if it was only open for her. Indeed, upon occasion she became angry and would yell at me "I will not be your porn queen." Even then we didn't know the term "cuckold." Never-the-less, in her mid-40s, she decided she would date other men.

[toreaddave]

It happened to me twice -- during my first and second marriages. Both times it was my wife who made the decision to cuckold me, and both times is was well into the marriage; 8 years in my first marriage and 16 years after my second.

My first wife cheated on me, and only told me after she had been getting fucked by a co-worker. I had never heard of the word "cuckold" back then, but discovered it excited me for other men to fuck my wife. The reason for our divorce had nothing to do with our sex lives.

My second wife knew of my background, but never expressed any interest in being a hot wife -- until her mid-40s. She knew she had a free pass if she wanted one. So it was just a matter of her telling me that she planned on dating other men. She even had me pick up the picture to go on her internet ad advertising that she was a married woman seeking to date.

Thanks for sharing! Interesting that you discovered you enjoyed it only after being cuckolded. For your second wife, you said she knew about your background. So did you tell her early on that you enjoyed cuckolding?

I had never heard of cuckolding, although she and I had tried wife swapping, so she knew she liked new dicks in her cunt. When we were swapping, my thoughts were on fucking the other wife; although I did find it titillated me when she talked about how the other husband fucked her. Perhaps that planted the seed. I had no idea that I could be turned on by my wife getting fucked by other men until it happened; and I had no idea what being cuckolded was.

When she confessed to me that she was getting fucked at work (she and her co-worker were alone in the office in the afternoons) and had actually made me eat her out with his cum still in her cunt, I discovered it excited me as much as if I had fucked her myself.

It happened to me twice -- during my first and second marriages. Both times it was my wife who made the decision to cuckold me, and both times is was well into the marriage; 8 years in my first marriage and 16 years after my second.

My first wife cheated on me, and only told me after she had been getting fucked by a co-worker. I had never heard of the word "cuckold" back then, but discovered it excited me for other men to fuck my wife. The reason for our divorce had nothing to do with our sex lives.

My second wife knew of my background, but never expressed any interest in being a hot wife -- until her mid-40s. She knew she had a free pass if she wanted one. So it was just a matter of her telling me that she planned on dating other men. She even had me pick up the picture to go on her internet ad advertising that she was a married woman seeking to date.

Thanks for sharing! Interesting that you discovered you enjoyed it only after being cuckolded. For your second wife, you said she knew about your background. So did you tell her early on that you enjoyed cuckolding?

I gave you the background of how I came to finding out the thrill of being cuckold, but I didn't really answer your question.

Even when we were dating, I told my future wife that I had been involved in several swinging relationships and, if she wanted, she could continue to see other men. Even though she had been rather promiscuous while single, and (for a short time) she continued to be fucked by another man when we started dating; she indicated she had no desire for an open marriage, even if it was only open for her. Indeed, upon occasion she became angry and would yell at me "I will not be your porn queen." Even then we didn't know the term "cuckold." Never-the-less, in her mid-40s, she decided she would date other men.

I see, thanks for all the details. When she yelled at you about not being your porn queen, was it because you kept pushing her? Also, do you know what caused her to change her mind?

[SheLikesWhenIWatch]

First:
It depends on what you mean when you say "introduce."

I believe that the sooner you tell your partner you get excited by the idea, the better. If everything is "out there," there will be no shocking moment for the marriage/relationship that may be a source of friction. (No pun intended!)

I remember telling my wife that I wanted to see her with another man. She said she felt dirty, that I was not who she thought she was marrying. I was heartbroken.

Over time, she came to accept my fantasy. It took more than a decade before she started to share my fantasy. Until then, it was rocky going.

It was another six years before she decided that the idea was plausible...that she might be down to try it. Another year before she found a fellow (a coworker) who was okay with the idea. He wasn't immediately ready, that is, but wouldn't mind easing into it...about another year before I was allowed to be in the same room...about one more year until I was finally standing next to the bed jerking off while he pounded her lights out.

She now rather enjoys the experience. She feels empowered. She can have as much dick as she wants while knowing that I am forever faithful to her. She now says she didn't know what she was so afraid of when I first told her about my kink...wishes we had started earlier...has even heard of women cucking their husbands on their wedding night and thinks that's really cool...admires those women and their husbands. Now...She likes when I watch!

She does not humiliate, but she likes to moan and tell me how good he feels.

Think about how much different that would have been had we started off from day one with her knowing that watching would be "a thing" for me. Instead of starting in our 30s (She was 35. I was 39.), it would have been our 20s.

[toreaddave]

First:
It depends on what you mean when you say "introduce."

I believe that the sooner you tell your partner you get excited by the idea, the better. If everything is "out there," there will be no shocking moment for the marriage/relationship that may be a source of friction. (No pun intended!)

I remember telling my wife that I wanted to see her with another man. She said she felt dirty, that I was not who she thought she was marrying. I was heartbroken.

Over time, she came to accept my fantasy. It took more than a decade before she started to share my fantasy. Until then, it was rocky going.

It was another six years before she decided that the idea was plausible...that she might be down to try it. Another year before she found a fellow (a coworker) who was okay with the idea. He wasn't immediately ready, that is, but wouldn't mind easing into it...about another year before I was allowed to be in the same room...about one more year until I was finally standing next to the bed jerking off while he pounded her lights out.

She now rather enjoys the experience. She feels empowered. She can have as much dick as she wants while knowing that I am forever faithful to her. She now says she didn't know what she was so afraid of when I first told her about my kink...wishes we had started earlier...has even heard of women cucking their husbands on their wedding night and thinks that's really cool...admires those women and their husbands. Now...She likes when I watch!

She does not humiliate, but she likes to moan and tell me how good he feels.

Think about how much different that would have been had we started off from day one with her knowing that watching would be "a thing" for me. Instead of starting in our 30s (She was 35. I was 39.), it would have been our 20s.

Thanks for sharing! That's a very valuable anecdote to learn from. I think I'm leaning towards "the sooner the better" as well.

[tractorman2]

I met my future wife as she turned 16, she was a virgin. Months later she gave me her virginity then soon after she went out with a man who was in his mid 30s whom unknown to me she had a crush on since she was 15, (later changed by her to 14) and now wanted to feel him inside her.

Why didnt she fuck him when she was 14-15?, she told me she didnt want him to take her virginity that was for someone special.

So she had the intention at 14-15 about wanting to be fucked by this man, knew he wanted her too, but she wanted a real boyfriend someone she really liked to give her virginity too. So really this showed me that even at that age she believed once she had a lovely boyfriend and had given him her virginity then she could and would also be free to fuck him too.

Complicated indeed but i would say having this intention and desire at 14-15 then doing it at 16 is quite young.

[hotfreaks]

For my wife and I, it was after a few months of dating, bit thats what worked for us. Almost 20 years later and we are still active in the lifestyle and love it

[toreaddave]

I met my future wife as she turned 16, she was a virgin. Months later she gave me her virginity then soon after she went out with a man who was in his mid 30s whom unknown to me she had a crush on since she was 15, (later changed by her to 14) and now wanted to feel him inside her.

Why didnt she fuck him when she was 14-15?, she told me she didnt want him to take her virginity that was for someone special.

So she had the intention at 14-15 about wanting to be fucked by this man, knew he wanted her too, but she wanted a real boyfriend someone she really liked to give her virginity too. So really this showed me that even at that age she believed once she had a lovely boyfriend and had given him her virginity then she could and would also be free to fuck him too.

Complicated indeed but i would say having this intention and desire at 14-15 then doing it at 16 is quite young.

Oh wow that is very young indeed. When did you become interested in cuckolding?

[toreaddave]

For my wife and I, it was after a few months of dating, bit thats what worked for us. Almost 20 years later and we are still active in the lifestyle and love it

Thanks for sharing! I'd consider a few months still fairly early in a relationship, so another successful anecdote for introducing it early. Who brought up the idea?

[tractorman2]

I met my future wife as she turned 16, she was a virgin. Months later she gave me her virginity then soon after she went out with a man who was in his mid 30s whom unknown to me she had a crush on since she was 15, (later changed by her to 14) and now wanted to feel him inside her.

Why didnt she fuck him when she was 14-15?, she told me she didnt want him to take her virginity that was for someone special.

So she had the intention at 14-15 about wanting to be fucked by this man, knew he wanted her too, but she wanted a real boyfriend someone she really liked to give her virginity too. So really this showed me that even at that age she believed once she had a lovely boyfriend and had given him her virginity then she could and would also be free to fuck him too.

Complicated indeed but i would say having this intention and desire at 14-15 then doing it at 16 is quite young.

Oh wow that is very young indeed. When did you become interested in cuckolding?

Even at 16 i liked men looking at my trophy girlfriend at 6ft she was tall, slim and very pretty, rare in the area we lived in. A fine wearer of tight jeans she certainly attracted a lot of attention and i knew it....and liked it. She hated it.

I forgave her for her mistake at 16, but at 17 another confession, on holiday drunk she had been fucked, she cried as she told me this and for some reason i actually liked her confession making love to make her feel wanted, valued and loved.

The blue print for our relationship was set at this time and we both knew it yet didnt discuss what this ment for us. I suspected we didnt really know
but time has shown that she had more idea than me and she knew whilst loving me i would probably accept other "mistakes" in the future.

[toreaddave]

I met my future wife as she turned 16, she was a virgin. Months later she gave me her virginity then soon after she went out with a man who was in his mid 30s whom unknown to me she had a crush on since she was 15, (later changed by her to 14) and now wanted to feel him inside her.

Why didnt she fuck him when she was 14-15?, she told me she didnt want him to take her virginity that was for someone special.

So she had the intention at 14-15 about wanting to be fucked by this man, knew he wanted her too, but she wanted a real boyfriend someone she really liked to give her virginity too. So really this showed me that even at that age she believed once she had a lovely boyfriend and had given him her virginity then she could and would also be free to fuck him too.

Complicated indeed but i would say having this intention and desire at 14-15 then doing it at 16 is quite young.

Oh wow that is very young indeed. When did you become interested in cuckolding?

Even at 16 i liked men looking at my trophy girlfriend at 6ft she was tall, slim and very pretty, rare in the area we lived in. A fine wearer of tight jeans she certainly attracted a lot of attention and i knew it....and liked it. She hated it.

I forgave her for her mistake at 16, but at 17 another confession, on holiday drunk she had been fucked, she cried as she told me this and for some reason i actually liked her confession making love to make her feel wanted, valued and loved.

The blue print for our relationship was set at this time and we both knew it yet didnt discuss what this ment for us. I suspected we didnt really know
but time has shown that she had more idea than me and she knew whilst loving me i would probably accept other "mistakes" in the future.

"Mistakes"

[isinlarsa]

I met my future wife as she turned 16, she was a virgin. Months later she gave me her virginity then soon after she went out with a man who was in his mid 30s whom unknown to me she had a crush on since she was 15, (later changed by her to 14) and now wanted to feel him inside her.

Why didnt she fuck him when she was 14-15?, she told me she didnt want him to take her virginity that was for someone special.

So she had the intention at 14-15 about wanting to be fucked by this man, knew he wanted her too, but she wanted a real boyfriend someone she really liked to give her virginity too. So really this showed me that even at that age she believed once she had a lovely boyfriend and had given him her virginity then she could and would also be free to fuck him too.

Complicated indeed but i would say having this intention and desire at 14-15 then doing it at 16 is quite young.

Oh wow that is very young indeed. When did you become interested in cuckolding?

Even at 16 i liked men looking at my trophy girlfriend at 6ft she was tall, slim and very pretty, rare in the area we lived in. A fine wearer of tight jeans she certainly attracted a lot of attention and i knew it....and liked it. She hated it.

I forgave her for her mistake at 16, but at 17 another confession, on holiday drunk she had been fucked, she cried as she told me this and for some reason i actually liked her confession making love to make her feel wanted, valued and loved.

The blue print for our relationship was set at this time and we both knew it yet didnt discuss what this ment for us. I suspected we didnt really know
but time has shown that she had more idea than me and she knew whilst loving me i would probably accept other "mistakes" in the future.

"Mistakes"

Reminds me of the Britney Spears song, "Opps. I did it again." I had a girlfriend like that. She ended up getting seduced while on business trips several times. Each time she would tell me later -- not as soon as she got home but after several days. She said she hadn't meant to have sex, but got caught up in the moment and ended up succumbing to a man's advances. Like Jessica Rabbit, she was drawn that way.

So did she make other "mistakes" in the future? Did the two of you finally accept she was a hotwife?

[hotfreaks]

For my wife and I, it was after a few months of dating, bit thats what worked for us. Almost 20 years later and we are still active in the lifestyle and love it

Thanks for sharing! I'd consider a few months still fairly early in a relationship, so another successful anecdote for introducing it early. Who brought up the idea?

Well, my wife then gf, told me very early on she was into women as well. Also telling me about her past with different men.

I brought it up to her, and we both agreed it's something we should try, so we did and never looked back