A writing assignment on a cuck’s angst

[Abrandnewstart194]

My Queen has given me a writing assignment that she might read after her next assignation with her Bull. She thought it would be massively arousing to read in the immediate aftermath and afterglow of her coupling about my angst as her cuck.

After the first time my Queen cucked me, back in March, and a disastrous follow up meeting in May, we decided that it would be better if I NOT know about her plans in advance. Much better for her to meet her Bull, and let me know afterwards.

This has a twofold effect, it eliminates the overwhelming anticipatory angst, as well as the angst of waiting to hear from her about her play dates, and it loads EVERY DAY with a bearable measure of angst, which only grows as the time between contacts with her grows longer.

I know that she has plans to fuck him this week. It’s been seven days since last he slid his cock into her up to his balls, so I know she’s aching for it already. So, is she fucking him today? Tomorrow? Friday? Probably not Friday because that’s her busiest day in the office. Saturday’s right out because of work in the morning, and traveling in the afternoon.

That makes it today, or tomorrow. Her schedule was full today until 2:00 because of an event she was supposed yo attend, but which has since been cancelled. It could have been a fiction, but her backstory was so detailed that it seems unlikely, but it’s not impossible that when we got off the phone an hour ago she might have been showing up to meet him at a hotel. She has met him for midday fucks before now. She could even now be naked, and writhing under his lust, and his control. Did she assign this to me so she can read in a few hours what I was writing, what I was experiencing as she serves her Bulls needs, and her own?

But she was posting to the group only forty-five minutes ago… She had also promised to message me during the work event, so maybe not…

Even if not, and the event was real, her schedule was clear from 2:00 onward. Could she be meeting him then? Did she spend the morning preparing herself for an afternoon session with him? Did she shower with a purpose to prepare her body for him? Did she take extra time to trim herself according to his preferences? Did she apply her makeup, and perfume herself with special care this morning, slide into especially sexy lingerie, knowing that it would be coming off at her Bull’s feet?

Shall I start counting the minutes at 2:00 until I next hear from her? It would probably take at least half an hour to pack up, and leave an event, then up to half an hour to get from the event to the hotel…add fifteen minutes for her to stop, and retouch her makeup, and whatever other final preparations girls make before going to bed with a man, much less a Bull.

Probably 3:30 - THAT’s when I should start getting nervous. That’s when I start checking to see how long it’s been since we last talked, or messaged each other.

How long since she was active in Messenger? Half an hour? Means nothing.

An hour? Could be something, but still probably innocent.

Two hours? Two and a half? Three? Something is SURELY going on. She is almost certainly naked, and sweating, and panting, and covered with her cum.She’s whimpering “yes, Yes, YES!!!” at his pounding. His fingers flick lightly across her clitoris, her eyes roll back, and she explodes yet again…

Now, how long until they’re done? How long until she lies exhausted by buildup and climax repeated a dozen times of more, and crumpled like a rag doll amid wet bedclothes that she herself has soaked? Four hours is how long they typically go, though he could go longer.

But four hours from when? When did they start? Make a guess, count out four, then
half an hour to get cleaned up, dressed, and back to her car whereupon she will call me breathless, and elated to tell me that her Bull has again carried her to heights she never knew possible, even after their last frenzied fuck.

Or, I get a call, or a text at 3:00 to let me know she’s finished with work for the day, and I go through it all again on Thursday, her work at home day when her schedule is whatever she makes it. Probably not in the morning because she still dies have work to do, and how could she ever go back to work while still cock drunk, and blissed out from her Bull’s body, so afternoon, probably, but when….

[Abrandnewstart194]

2:10 and she’s been off messenger for just over half an hour. I know that 3:30 was the probable time for them to meet, but with her event canceled, they’re free to meet earlier. Did they pull it forward to 2:00, or 1:45?

Are they in bed right now? Is he giving her what I can’t even as I type these words???

My hands shake slightly. It will get worse the longer I wait to find out, until I’m shaking like a leaf.

[Abrandnewstart194]

Oh shit, she’s been completely offline for an hour. I think this is it, I think she’s fucking him right now.

If she is, I won’t hear from her until at least 6:00.

Until then, there’s edging to her videos from her other session with her Bull. It’s looking like this is number six…

[Abrandnewstart194]

Two hours now…she is definitely worshipping her Bull’s lust with her body.

There is nothing for me to do but to wait for my Queen. I’m edging, and watching all of the videos she has shared with me of them fucking. I stroke furiously as I think “Yes, that’s what they’re doing right now. She’s serving the Bull whom she craves with a burning addiction, submitting absolutely, and obeying him unquestioningly in exchange for her fix of his superior body, and sex, and ecstasies.

I close my eyes and repeat to myself, as a mantra to accompany the knot tightening in my gut, “My Queen serves her Bull. My Queen serves her Bull. It is right that my Queen serves her Bull while her cuck waits, and stokes impotently. My Queen serves her Bull.”

I have at the least two and a half hours of this agony ahead of me. Then the phone call, knowing what she will tell me when I answer. It’s the call I’ve been longing for that frees me from my agony, but which I fear because it confirms that she has been in paradise without me, yet again.

[Abrandnewstart194]

Three hours…I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I can’t concentrate on anything. I can’t sit still, but I can’t walk, or do some other mundane thing with this claw tearing, and twisting me inside.

I watch the videos again…

“First Time Sucking 3.22.2033”
“First Time Riding 3.22.2023”
“Missionary 7.27.3023”
“Oh god, M 7.27.2023”
“Bent Over Table 8.20.2023”
“Don’t You Wish 8.23.2023”
“He’s In My Ass 8.23.2023”

She’s doing these things right now, in paradise with her Bull. He is teaching her things about her body she never knew, but without which she can now not live, and she is a willing, and eager student.

I don’t know when I can reclaim her.

I know that she will read this after she’s been fucked to oblivion, when she’s home still cock drunk, feeling the afterglow of their repeated frenetic coupling. Too tired to play, too satisfied by a superior Bull to want me, or to take pleasure in the small beer of phone sex with a cuck, she’ll begin to delve into my searing experience which unfolded in parallel with her carnal celebrations.

When she heard me read back to her my experience of being cucked that first time, she was worried, and for all of her bliss, she felt anguish at having caused such pain even though I was a willing victim of it. This time, she might feel some pangs of that, but she is a different woman now than she was in March. This Cuckoldress has grown into her role, and in stature as a Queen. She commanded me to write my experience so she could read about my angst, and enjoy the pleasure of it.

[Abrandnewstart194]

Three and a half hours of radio silence…let’s say three hours of mind bending sex with her Bull. Roughly an hour to go. My mind reels at the pleasures he is giving her while she does everything, gives him everything in desperation to repay pleasure with pleasure…all taking place on a plane that I can’t reach, to which I can never transport her, except by urging her indulgence with her Bull.

It’s times like this that the veil of smug self-satisfaction at having the love of such a glorious woman parts, and I can feel all of my pathetic inadequacy. He is better. He fucks her better. Sex with him is euphoric, with me…pedestrian. My self loathing pops in to say “Hi.”

I console myself that my Queen is free to be a Queen, and isn’t fated to a lifetime of mediocre sex with an inadequate cuck. That helps me to bear the strain as my erection wanes. When she calls the arousal will be gone, all that will be left are the nerves, and the fearful pounding of my heart as she recounts to me details which will drive me crazy with lust tomorrow, but this evening will fall like hammer blows upon ears that crave, and dread every detail.

I haven’t eaten all day. I’m starving, but food hold no allure. Still, I have to force myself. At least the beers on ice will go down easily, and with them I can toast, and celebrate my sixth cucking for my Queen’s glory!

[Clement99]

Look forward to hearing how it went. :-)

[Abrandnewstart194]

Four and a half hours…I managed to choke down some dinner, but my nerves may just bring it back up…I don’t know.

I do know that my love for my Queen is beyond the reach of words, or actions. I just know that I love her to the point that I will do anything for her.

[KyGrappler80]

Oh wow. I appreciate the play by play. I know this must be delicious agony. I have been looking at pics of your fiance on OF. I know so many expressions on her face now, and the wonderful curves of her body. And her bull must be owning all of that. Making her his. This guy you hate becoming the center of her world as he pleasures her more than shes been pleasured before. Wow.

[Jujube]

Omg, I just saw on the “Hotties” that you’ve been cucked for the 6th time! What delicious agony! I foresee overnights in your future. What a way to cement your cuck surrender while giving QueenHedone all the intimacy she craves. Steamy sex followed by cuddling and sleeping together, followed by waking up to intense morning sex! The possibilities are endless, as will be your angst. Hang in there, Polyphemus!

[Jujube]

Haha! “Delicious Agony” is the phrase of the day!

[afagehi7]

Sounds like some really hot videos!!!

Sounds like the Pinnacle of cuck angst

[Jujube]

Okay, what’s happened? Did you two decide to exit this forum?

[SeaGirtCuck]

Maybe he sailed off the edge.