Conflicting feelings

[Itman]

It has been a long time since I have written. In the past I have told you about the adventures I had as a cuckold. A summary, my wife 38yo has made me happy three single times in the last few years by fucking three different men. The first one an ex. The second and third were black.
She really likes blacks. However, she has many moments when she is doubtful and says that I am enough for her, that she doesn't want other men. One example: we have fantasies between the two of us, I make her come with an orgasm and then she says she wouldn't do what she did in the past again.
She has been fucking only me for at least a year and a half, partly because we had a baby the end of last summer. Since the birth she has said she wants to be respected and not ask her to fuck other men yet.
I have accepted and understood her feelings.
However 10 days ago she started to be very horny and we made many fantasies about blacks fucking her, we also see porn movies with BBC.
She keeps saying they are just fantasies.
But three days ago she joined a sex dating site and is chatting with some blacks.
There are times when I ask her, do you want to fuck a black man again? She answers yes. Other moments when she tells me it almost disgusts her to think about fucking others again. The worst moments are after she has had an intense orgasm.
Is this fast change in feelings normal? my current strategy is not to force it and let her do it. Now she says she is having fun chatting but nothing more. Any suggestions?

[Long Lurker 34]

It has been a long time since I have written. In the past I have told you about the adventures I had as a cuckold. A summary, my wife 38yo has made me happy three single times in the last few years by fucking three different men. The first one an ex. The second and third were black.
She really likes blacks. However, she has many moments when she is doubtful and says that I am enough for her, that she doesn't want other men. One example: we have fantasies between the two of us, I make her come with an orgasm and then she says she wouldn't do what she did in the past again.
She has been fucking only me for at least a year and a half, partly because we had a baby the end of last summer. Since the birth she has said she wants to be respected and not ask her to fuck other men yet.
I have accepted and understood her feelings.
However 10 days ago she started to be very horny and we made many fantasies about blacks fucking her, we also see porn movies with BBC.
She keeps saying they are just fantasies.
But three days ago she joined a sex dating site and is chatting with some blacks.
There are times when I ask her, do you want to fuck a black man again? She answers yes. Other moments when she tells me it almost disgusts her to think about fucking others again. The worst moments are after she has had an intense orgasm.
Is this fast change in feelings normal? my current strategy is not to force it and let her do it. Now she says she is having fun chatting but nothing more. Any suggestions?

IM - No expert, but your wife has had a ton of hormones related to the baby coursing through her body. I would imagine it would take awhile for these things to settle down. A thought at least.

[Itman]

This situation occurred even before pregnancy and the birth of the child.
Her words: if I listen to my pussy I would get fucked by the first black guy who passes by (particularly during ovulation time). She has moments when she doesn't want this, though.
Have any of your wives moments like mine? Reading the stories on the forum it almost seems like our wives are either completely sluts or nuns. Mine is Dr. Jekyll (I don't need these things anymore, please no ask me again) and Mr. Hyde (I want a black cock).

[Topnotch]

Mine can go back and forth. Sometimes she is all over it hot as hell! Then she will shut down, completely cold about it all. She doesn't have a inter racial thing, so I'm not sure if that's different, but I wouldn't think so. I think women just like us guys have different moods. Sometimes the girls just stick to their moods longer.

[Dazedandconfused71]

It has been a long time since I have written. In the past I have told you about the adventures I had as a cuckold. A summary, my wife 38yo has made me happy three single times in the last few years by fucking three different men. The first one an ex. The second and third were black.
She really likes blacks. However, she has many moments when she is doubtful and says that I am enough for her, that she doesn't want other men. One example: we have fantasies between the two of us, I make her come with an orgasm and then she says she wouldn't do what she did in the past again.
She has been fucking only me for at least a year and a half, partly because we had a baby the end of last summer. Since the birth she has said she wants to be respected and not ask her to fuck other men yet.
I have accepted and understood her feelings.
However 10 days ago she started to be very horny and we made many fantasies about blacks fucking her, we also see porn movies with BBC.
She keeps saying they are just fantasies.
But three days ago she joined a sex dating site and is chatting with some blacks.
There are times when I ask her, do you want to fuck a black man again? She answers yes. Other moments when she tells me it almost disgusts her to think about fucking others again. The worst moments are after she has had an intense orgasm.
Is this fast change in feelings normal? my current strategy is not to force it and let her do it. Now she says she is having fun chatting but nothing more. Any suggestions?

Sounds a bit like my wife. For years she said she wasn’t into big cocks and was not attracted to black men. Then she found one she liked and she could not get enough of being fucked by him.
Recently he ended it and she was visibly upset. She says she’s done and cured of her desires/addiction - mostly because I didn’t react well to her having a solo experience. HOWEVER; if I can get her to talk about it, she freaking glows and lights up….and she admits it’s like a drug. She will occasionally admit she still wants it to be a permanent part of her life and that huge cock feels better in her pussy.
I think she’s hooked on fucking BBC now!!!

[JJinMN]

…She really likes blacks……..However 10 days ago she started to be very horny and we made many fantasies about blacks fucking her…… and is chatting with some blacks…..

Dude, you have some legit questions for this board but please stop referring to black men in an object form as “blacks.” Am I the only one who cringed at this?

[DavaoMike]

…She really likes blacks……..However 10 days ago she started to be very horny and we made many fantasies about blacks fucking her…… and is chatting with some blacks…..

Dude, you have some legit questions for this board but please stop referring to black men in an object form as “blacks.” Am I the only one who cringed at this?

Getting a bit oversensitive, are we? If you don’t like it, don’t read it. Political correctness gone mad! Sheesh! lol

DM

[zorro]

Bottom line (no pun intended): Women are more than pussies. They have minds and a complicated set of demands, duties, obligations, and standards to contend with.
When they are more relaxed or otherwise in the mood, they can delight us by wanting to fuck as female sexual beings. But when weighed down by other considerations, a woman who is otherwise a pistol may not want to go there.

My recommendation: Give your wife loving patience to allow her feelings to be free enough to want to play again. Keep in mind this is a woman's sport, and the women have to want to do it.

We address this issue by us talking about playdates, but Ruth issues the invitations when she wants to play. That way, she is not pressured into anything she does not desire. It works pretty well for us.

What do other couples do to manage this common situation?

[WannabeHusbandOfHW]

…She really likes blacks……..However 10 days ago she started to be very horny and we made many fantasies about blacks fucking her…… and is chatting with some blacks…..

Dude, you have some legit questions for this board but please stop referring to black men in an object form as “blacks.” Am I the only one who cringed at this?

Getting a bit oversensitive, are we? If you don’t like it, don’t read it. Political correctness gone mad! Sheesh! lol

DM

Agree with JJinMN

[armyguyot1]

I nearly locked this thread but thought I would let you work it out. There was no disrespect intended and just the opposite I believe. If it continues I will shut it down.

[Itman]

Yesterday she was on the dating site all day and chatted in telegram with a man. She was excited. Then at night in bed I expected sparks and fireworks but.... instead she was cold and told me that she doesn't feel slutty like the women on the site and that she doesn't need like other men. I was very sad but I respect her and accepted her decision. I don't want to push her. I agree with your suggestion of loving patience.

[onceacuck]

Sounds as though she thinks there's something immoral or shameful about enjoying sex with multiple men. That's an unhealthy attitude, in my opinion, and regardless of whether she actually does it again it would be good for her to learn to be proud of who she is. I imagine it will be very difficult to get her to change her outlook, but you could try just expressing how much you respect her for having had the courage to experiment.

[mrdnrm]

Become a selfish lover, when you're having sex always cum before her and don't help her cum. Leave her frustrated and then talk about other man. that she has been with or could be with. If you are not taking care of her sexually she with think about other ways to satisfy her itch.

[Des 31]

It has been a long time since I have written. In the past I have told you about the adventures I had as a cuckold. A summary, my wife 38yo has made me happy three single times in the last few years by fucking three different men. The first one an ex. The second and third were black.
She really likes blacks. However, she has many moments when she is doubtful and says that I am enough for her, that she doesn't want other men. One example: we have fantasies between the two of us, I make her come with an orgasm and then she says she wouldn't do what she did in the past again.
She has been fucking only me for at least a year and a half, partly because we had a baby the end of last summer. Since the birth she has said she wants to be respected and not ask her to fuck other men yet.
I have accepted and understood her feelings.
However 10 days ago she started to be very horny and we made many fantasies about blacks fucking her, we also see porn movies with BBC.
She keeps saying they are just fantasies.
But three days ago she joined a sex dating site and is chatting with some blacks.
There are times when I ask her, do you want to fuck a black man again? She answers yes. Other moments when she tells me it almost disgusts her to think about fucking others again. The worst moments are after she has had an intense orgasm.
Is this fast change in feelings normal? my current strategy is not to force it and let her do it. Now she says she is having fun chatting but nothing more. Any suggestions?

The clue to your dilemma is that she's sex-chatting with others. I'm reasonably sure your wife is thinking about having sex with others again, and it most likely won't be long before she hooks up with another guy. I think it's common that women go through stages of giving in to lust, then backing off for a while as a result of societal attitudes. Sex is a need, and sex outside marriage is far more exciting than fucking the husband a wife lives with day-to-day.

My wife openly confesses to me that she needs extramarital sex. I wanted that for her before she began dating other men. Once she experienced it, she said there's no turning back to the time when it was just the two of us. I enjoy her adventures as much as she.

[submissivedanny]

My wife for a couple of years was fucking everyone she could but after a while she felt like she was just a slut and was having second thoughts until she met a guy from her job and now they only see each other. She loves just having one guy right now who doesn't just fuck her but he makes love to her. She loves him and he loves her and I prefer that too.

[Itman]

Update. My wife says she does not desire anyone else, but at the same time she understands that shutting me off from all hope reduces my excitement. She likes to make me happy, so she is currently chatting with a man without the immediate idea of a meeting. Just to keep my Cuckold desire alive.

[desertsub]

Update. My wife says she does not desire anyone else, but at the same time she understands that shutting me off from all hope reduces my excitement. She likes to make me happy, so she is currently chatting with a man without the immediate idea of a meeting. Just to keep my Cuckold desire alive.

That is a step in the right direction. Feelings change and she could eventually cuckold you. My wife stopped cuckolding me when the kids were getting older and told me that was why she stopped. She later told me that she got emotionally involved with a guy she was fucking who wanted her to leave me for him. She said she actually considered it and then broke it off with him, and she had no desire to cuckold me again.

In spite of what she said she later changed her mind. When our youngest child moved out she decided to start cuckolding me again and she has been doing so ever since!

[Itman]

It's incredible what happened tonight. But let's take a step back.
For a week my wife had been chatting with a man. Tomorrow she will have an appointment to meet him at the bar.
Tonight we were horny as hell, I was touching her and she was wet, we were saying a lot of dirty things. Then she at one point asked me this question 'are you sure?you know how I am, do you accept to risk even that I have feelings for this man?'
I was stunned. I froze and said no. I don't want to risk to lose her love. She felt like relieved even though she told me she would do anything for me.
Now I don't understand anything anymore. On one hand I feel like the stupidest man in the world for giving up one step away from what I wanted. On the other I feel like an addict who just decided not to do drugs anymore or an alcoholic not to drink.
What a mess.

[Lucky Dog]

It's incredible what happened tonight. But let's take a step back.
...
Now I don't understand anything anymore. On one hand I feel like the stupidest man in the world for giving up one step away from what I wanted. On the other I feel like an addict who just decided not to do drugs anymore or an alcoholic not to drink.
What a mess.

Why do you look at it this way? Neither you nor your wife wants to take a risk that she will fall in love with a bull. This is something for both of you, so if you both trust one another, then she can stop short of hurting your relationship. If not hurting your relationship is what she really wants, do you worry she's not able to stick to what you both desire?

[Farmgirl]

Become a selfish lover, when you're having sex always cum before her and don't help her cum. Leave her frustrated and then talk about other man. that she has been with or could be with. If you are not taking care of her sexually she with think about other ways to satisfy her itch.

Oh yes, let's do this . That is a quick way to show that you don't care about her at all .

[mrdnrm]

Become a selfish lover, when you're having sex always cum before her and don't help her cum. Leave her frustrated and then talk about other man. that she has been with or could be with. If you are not taking care of her sexually she with think about other ways to satisfy her itch.

Oh yes, let's do this . That is a quick way to show that you don't care about her at all .

most guys are like that any way, they only think of themselves, I am sure if you really think back over your lifetime you may be able to think of a few guys that were like that although some other may have acted like they care but did not cut it for you and may have been just a good front. Unfortunately most women will not admit that as it may be an admission of just being used. When guys talked or brag about being with a girl when they are younger, when they talk about being with a girl they talk about how they banged her and busted a nut in her not how they got her off and how many orgasms they gave her. No guy talks about being sentimental and care about getting a girl her orgasm, they only talk about themselves. They don't start doing that until they are in their 30's. That is when they start thinking about quality not quantity.

[Farmgirl]

Become a selfish lover, when you're having sex always cum before her and don't help her cum. Leave her frustrated and then talk about other man. that she has been with or could be with. If you are not taking care of her sexually she with think about other ways to satisfy her itch.

Oh yes, let's do this . That is a quick way to show that you don't care about her at all .

most guys are like that any way, they only think of themselves, I am sure if you really think back over your lifetime you may be able to think of a few guys that were like that although some other may have acted like they care but did not cut it for you and may have been just a good front. Unfortunately most women will not admit that as it may be an admission of just being used. When guys talked or brag about being with a girl when they are younger, when they talk about being with a girl they talk about how they banged her and busted a nut in her not how they got her off and how many orgasms they gave her. No guy talks about being sentimental and care about getting a girl her orgasm, they only talk about themselves. They don't start doing that until they are in their 30's. That is when they start thinking about quality not quantity.

A pretty sad way for you to justify yourself.

[LongTermHubby]

Update. My wife says she does not desire anyone else, but at the same time she understands that shutting me off from all hope reduces my excitement. She likes to make me happy, so she is currently chatting with a man without the immediate idea of a meeting. Just to keep my Cuckold desire alive.

That is a step in the right direction. Feelings change and she could eventually cuckold you. My wife stopped cuckolding me when the kids were getting older and told me that was why she stopped. She later told me that she got emotionally involved with a guy she was fucking who wanted her to leave me for him. She said she actually considered it and then broke it off with him, and she had no desire to cuckold me again.

In spite of what she said she later changed her mind. When our youngest child moved out she decided to start cuckolding me again and she has been doing so ever since!

It was the same for us. My wife only felt comfortable seeing other men after our youngest child left home to go away to college.

[Farmgirl]

I never had to justify myself with anyone, maybe you just need to spend a little less time on the farm, how about you start with a few articles and then move on...
https://www.elitedaily.com/p/7-sex-beha ... t-19253426
https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/a ... sh-in-bed/

And yet, you've tried to justify yourself in each reply .
While you need to read magazine articles to learn about women and men, I find it much easier to learn in person while I'm on and off of the ranch. Do you also get your life lessons from watching 'The View', along with the magazines?

You gave some horrible advice to the OP, no reading of magazine articles justifies it, nor does your hoping that I spend "less time on the farm".

[gilder145]

Reading the stuff about being a selfish lover as a way to get her to stray I believe is a potential disaster waiting to happen I think it will only shut a woman down. This has to be shared adventure shared fantasy and the more pleasure associated with it the more likely it will happen. Just my experience but it did not happen for me until we were completely in sync.