Tom, Jasmine & My Step Dad (Has a Bully/Rival ever fucked your wife) Update

[Chrislydi]

I didn’t see Jas say they were on a break, did I miss that?…. But I do see self-sabotage; the comment on playing with fire & could get burnt - can’t change that, etc.

Well if you choose that, then yeah, you will be burnt. But if you say - oh hey, I’m going to go play with that fire over there, but I’ve got a fire retardant suit and a fire extinguisher ready, and I’ve taken all the precautions I can. Then yeah, much less likely for anyone to get hurt.

You guys can change how you play, it can still be exciting, can still be fun, Tom can enjoy the humiliation and Jas the new partner. But you can also enjoy knowing that Tom and his butterflies will always be there.

There is a lot of love in this thread, great to see so many care about a younger couple wanting their relationship to succeed.

Wishing Tom and Jas all the best. Good luck guys. Finding someone you can happily spend 10 years with is a blessing no matter your age. I think it’s safe to say we are all thinking of you.

Cogent advice indeed and so eloquently put too. Using the term 'break' might be a little wide of the mark but possibly alludes to seeing how Jas and Tatt's plays out before the two can take stock. There's only really massive goodwill from this poster, I just hope the future offers only good times ahead for both, but fear there may be difficult or uncertain times ahead.

[Chrislydi]

Can't wait to here more of this hot story as it evolves

Wouldn't you say calling a couple possibly going through relationship difficulties atm, 'a hot story' might be thought analogous to calling a car crash exciting?

Of course sex is hot, erotic and evokes great passion and feeling, that's as true for vanilla couples as any in an alternative LS. This story was hot to begin with, and there's definitely a huge turn on with risk, but that turn on isn't so great when it all turns to shit and loneliness. When depression and a massive feeling of irretrievable loss is your everyday companion, then it's not so hot at all, glib posts about how hot this story is may not be intended to hurt, but could just as easily drive a few more nails into the heart too.

In my mind it's similar to the car crash example, this can also be seen as something dramatic, something of a hot event to witness, shocking in its impact and disastrous for anyone injured or maimed. Then there are the people on the other side of the motorway or freeway, the ones who slow down as they pass, crane their necks to get a better look at the misery and suffering, what on earth caused this they ask? Look at him is he dead I wonder? If only I can slow down a little further and get a better look. They're the ones who perhaps cause the huge tailbacks in the opposite direction, they're perhaps similar to the 'its hot' posters in this context, the ones who may add to the suffering and misery of others, the ones who caused Joe Public to miss his vital appointment as he hits the end of the jam caused by the slowing drivers getting their ghoulish thrill for the day..

I hope this may help as that was my only intention.

[Bent_n_Twisted]

Can't wait to here more of this hot story as it evolves

Wouldn't you say calling a couple possibly going through relationship difficulties atm, 'a hot story' might be thought analogous to calling a car crash exciting?

Isn't that the main reason we watch NASCAR? To see the smash-ups?

Otherwise it's just go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left;...

[Lucky Dog]

Can't wait to here more of this hot story as it evolves

Wouldn't you say calling a couple possibly going through relationship difficulties atm, 'a hot story' might be thought analogous to calling a car crash exciting?

Isn't that the main reason we watch NASCAR? To see the smash-ups?

Otherwise it's just go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left;...

No. But if you're "Bent and Twisted," then OK.

[Chrislydi]

Haha, I may have gone on a little too much and must apologise to starman2 if I caused any offence whatsoever. Please be assured it was never my intention. I'm just on a long boring train journey up north and my mind was wandering a little. There's probably a lesson in there for myself too as I'm guilty of posting some thoughtless stuff at times. It's been a hard working week, that's my excuse anyway.

I just reread it, where on earth did I drag ghoulish up from?? Must be all the bad dreams of more London hotels next week, can't wait to get home to the wife and kids now.

[rascalnvixen]

Must be all the bad dreams of more London hotels next week, can't wait to get home to the wife and kids now.

Just be sure to let your wife know when you expect to arrive home! You don't want to interupt anything that she's enjoying!!

Rascal

[Chrislydi]

Must be all the bad dreams of more London hotels next week, can't wait to get home to the wife and kids now.

Just be sure to let your wife know when you expect to arrive home! You don't want to interupt anything that she's enjoying!!

Rascal

I wish

I've never missed her as much as this week I really can't wait to hold her again, I'm getting emotional now

[nekkedoutdoors]

Can't wait to here more of this hot story as it evolves

Wouldn't you say calling a couple possibly going through relationship difficulties atm, 'a hot story' might be thought analogous to calling a car crash exciting?

Isn't that the main reason we watch NASCAR? To see the smash-ups?

Otherwise it's just go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left; go go go go, turn left;...

But your description is exactly the reason to avoid watching Nascar. Daytona is in my backyard and watching drunk women in the infield falling off RV's and pickup's attempting to flash their tits to men traveling by them at 200 MHP is literally the only entertainment value provided. Otherwise it's very loud, the stench of fuel fills the air and clogs the lungs. It's a day of baking under a Florida sun with no hope for shade. Did I mention the noise? Forget having a conversation, and considering the education level of the majority of nascar enthusiasts, you can damn sure forget about having an intelligent one.

[afagehi7]

Still quiet

[SomeoneCuckMe]

Hello all, im feeling much better! Thank you for all the well wishes. Still abit rough but im good. Its been abit uneventful to be honest. Jas updated you as much as she could have. Not much has happened. Until today. Jas literally upped and left the house this morning just saying shes gone to her mums but things to note, she normally tells me in advance shes going to her mums, she normally texts me while shes there and she would have been back by now. None of that has happened. I have texted her with no reply. I will put myself out there now and say I think shes with Tatts.

[nekkedoutdoors]

Glad you're feeling better Tom. I wish you a continued recovery. Hmmm? Why do you think she would feel the need to mask her meeting with Tatts? She had been so forthcoming of her intentions prior. You think she is attempting to protect your feelings, not wanting to cause you stress while you are recovering?

PS. It's really nice to hear from you once again Tom.

[Chrislydi]

There are only good wishes from me Tom, i can't help but feel really saddened by this development,

I hope you'll be reconciled in the fullness of time but maybe playing this out is the only way now.. Online forums and anonymity usually go hand in hand as a rule, you barely get to know any John or Joanna Smith from Fred Bloggs or some other wierd pseudonym but you've been an exception. You're online presence has created the impression of a highly likeable, friendly, intelligent and very articulate young guy who this reader can't help but cheer on from the sidelines and be on your side.

Don't get too despondent Tom, this isn't a definite end game, no matter how it feels right now. We can't turn back time but that's a truism that hardly helps. Don't feel obliged to come on here, only do it if you think it might help. I really do wish you well whatever your future holds.

ChrisLydi

- I've updated a new members file to tell you a little more about me if you want to read it - link below

[SomeoneCuckMe]

Whatsapp:

Ive sent a million messages all day so wont bore you with them, they all just say where are you, what you doing etc.

21:38
J: Il be home tomorrow x
M: Where are you staying?
J: With Tatts x
M: You been with him all day?
J: Yh x
M: Why did you say you're going to your mums?
J: Because I cheated on you. Night xxx

[nekkedoutdoors]

Whatsapp:

Ive sent a million messages all day so wont bore you with them, they all just say where are you, what you doing etc.

21:38
J: Il be home tomorrow x
M: Where are you staying?
J: With Tatts x
M: You been with him all day?
J: Yh x
M: Why did you say you're going to your mums?
J: Because I cheated on you. Night xxx

You just gotta love this lady.

[SomeoneCuckMe]

M: What if I said I dont want this?
J: You dont have a choice anymore Tom.
M: You like him that much?
J: Yh. Night xxx

[ExiledSage]

I think your neediness is pushing her away. Move on--or act like you're moving on--I think thats the only way you might reel her back in, if that's even possible. Sorry she seems so indifferent.

[proudhusb217]

Sorry it came to this. You should have never made it seem like you're okay with her having anything less than firm commitment to your relationship.

I wouldn't wait around for her. If not Tatts, what about the next guy? It makes no sense to wait around for her to leave on her terms and on her own timeline.

[oldrunter]

Tom did agree to Jaz getting more involved with Tats as her boyfriend.
He finds it hot and accepts that Jaz decides.
It's going to be painful for Tom but let's see how this plays out without prejuding the outcome.
Jaz must still care a lot for Tom to spend the last few days with him whilst he recovers from covid.

[john jasson]

Glad you're feeling better, Tom. This is all very, very sad. I think we all invested a lot in the scene you had going. I echo what others have said, particularly Chrislydi, and proudhusb217 too on the specific issue of her having anything less than firm commitment to your relationship. That's a big red flag. The trouble is, as we keep coming back to, that you asked for her to do just this with no safety net. I have a lot of understanding for Jas's confusion too. You dropped this on her out of a clear blue sky, so while she was out with Tatts she was saying she just didn't care what you thought anymore, yet when she came home she spoke about her bath being run by "my wonderful boyfriend". Mixed messages, or what?

What have things been like between you during your covid isolation together? Warm like before? Cool and aloof? Bad atmosphere? Are you sleeping together? Getting sex with her? Does she bother pushing your buttons still, or has that become a chore she isn't interested in now? Does it feel like she has lost respect for you?

There are practicalities not too far down the road too. As others have said, Tatts is going to start wondering pretty soon why he can't come home with her. Not sure how she gets past that. Suppose she could say "Yeah we are on a break, but we still live together platonically and share the expenses." How tied together are your lives after 10 years, Tom? I think you said you rent your home? Would splitting just be a matter of one of you moving out? Could either of you afford to take the place on solo?

It's not hot anymore though, is it? OK, her saying she's cheating on you might raise a pang, but it ain't like watching her in the pub flirting with Steve for all of those years. You were getting more excitement out of that before you even pushed her down this road. It's certainly not hot like when she made you undress her for Leon as they both humiliated you, and her leaving the phone on so you could listen to them in action. I don't see what there is to push your cuck buttons in this anymore. She's having a vanilla relationship with someone else, and you're becoming history. And if she's away with Tatts, why would she care?

[Chrislydi]

I've thought on this, and isn't it far more than just a coincidence that when the Cornwall break took place, a holiday purportedly to find each other again, reconnect properly, take stock and agree a plan forward for the future, you both stated your agreed path forward.

Jas went on about Leon, a possible future relationship with another as yet unfound guy with the possibility of her developing strong feelings (she assured you she would tell you if this happened), but thirdly instaman or Tatts as we now call him.

They then were the three options but she also stipulated another aim, namely she would like to 'CHEAT' on you.

If we marry together her stated aim of taking instaman (Tatts) further with her aim to have the experience of CHEATING on you, then maybe we can see why she stipulated it.

If Tatts is a traditional type of guy who adheres to a traditional type of relationship - maybe marriage and kids, and be realistic, one full year of talking to anyone (especially one you're attracted to) should be ample time to get an idea. THEN doesn't it automatically follow that keeping her connection to you secret, having little interest in involving you further, AND CHEATING on you makes every sense.

Ok so let's play detectives again and I'll put on the Sherlock Holmes deerstalker hat, smoke his pipe and ponder

CONCLUSION:- As John says Jas wants a secret relationship with Tatts, if it works out there's every chance that's ALL she wants, CHEATING, SECRECY, DEVELOPING STRONG FEELINGS hits three stated aims and she already knows how (traditional?) Tatts looks at things - I think the writing is on the wall here, if this relationship works it hardly creates anything for you.

You read about Curious Dave's split with his wife Jenna, this is now being re-enacted in front of your own eyes

In view of that then the advice and reasoning from proudhusb217 makes all the more sense

Sorry it came to this. You should have never made it seem like you're okay with her having anything less than firm commitment to your relationship.

I wouldn't wait around for her. If not Tatts, what about the next guy? It makes no sense to wait around for her to leave on her terms and on her own timeline.

[mundyman]

M: What if I said I dont want this?
J: You dont have a choice anymore Tom.
M: You like him that much?
J: Yh. Night xxx

Hi Tom,
Is this not the logical consequence of you encouraging Jas to pursue this lifestyle?
Isn’t it the logical conclusion of you encouraging her to have a full blown relationship with someone else, to the point where you become second, where she ‘cheats’ on you to do it.
That she does this without asking your permission, or having any consideration for your feelings?
Of course it is.
However the ball is now in your court. Yes your soul is on fire now as you deal with the angst, pain, and hurt of being number two. To having Jas so honestly and succinctly tell you the truth.
So what is your response?
Do you totally fold and reinforce your beta status to Jas, or do you hang in there, stay with Jas, continue to love her, while you wait for the NRE to wear off?
Do you live in this new relationship you wanted and encouraged? Do you learn to live with the feelings this lifestyle creates or do you walk away?
This is no doubt a slap in the face, even as you recover from Covid.
I would personally encourage you to hang in there. See if you can deal with the lifestyle. Continue to communicate with Jas.
My guess is this will last through the summer as the world opens up and they want to spend more time together doing things outside.
You two just had a beautiful week together. Perhaps she is acting this way to you because you encouraged it. You told her this turns you on in some strange way you can’t understand. Perhaps she is playing up the ‘game’ to push your buttons.
Whatever happens, thank you for sharing your journey. Thank you for taking the time to share.
Good luck to you and Jas.

[Chrislydi]

There are then two clear outcomes

It works between Jas and Tatts and she LEAVES YOU within months

OR

It doesn't work and they split up, if you're still around then you pick up the pieces but she may be suffering in her heart then too.

(If it fails it still could be some time and there are no guarantees that it will, none whatsoever - but even if it falis, the precedent is set and the scenario likely to be repeated)

In looking at this then maybe some realism when reviewing the leeway you were happy to concede makes sense

. you're okay with her having anything less than firm commitment to your relationship.

So let's say it doesn't work that leeway amounts to a repeating series of chances for option one to be the result, SHE FINDS one that's permanent and LEAVES then

Part of the attraction and heightened arousal is to constantly run the risk, we all know that, but it seems you are running the risk with loaded dice, you are certain to lose - there are no firm commitments to your relationship and that spells it out.

[alighieri20]

I'm curious to know if Jas came back as promised and what transpired during her stay with Tatts.

Unlike the other commenters here, I still have more than a sliver of hope that this is just hard cuckolding on part of Jas than heartbreak for Tom. The NRE will perhaps wear off just like it did with Leon although Tatts seems to engage Jas in aspects other than the sexual.

[john jasson]

I'm curious to know if Jas came back as promised and what transpired during her stay with Tatts.

Unlike the other commenters here, I still have more than a sliver of hope that this is just hard cuckolding on part of Jas than heartbreak for Tom. The NRE will perhaps wear off just like it did with Leon although Tatts seems to engage Jas in aspects other than the sexual.

I think we all have the hope, because we've all come to like Tom and Jas, and we love their exploits. The problem is that if he is going to push her at fit, affluent, eligible bachelors, then even if it starts off as Jas pushing Tom's buttons, there is every chance she's going to start comparing what she can have with them to what she had with Tom. She isn't made of stone, and it's Tom that has the kink, not necessarily Jas.

[SomeoneCuckMe]

Jas drunkenly fucked Steve again yesterday and they both pretty much walked all over me, treated me a cum dump, he slapped me in the face with his dick, spat on me, tied me up in a chair and didnt let me wank. How did this come about? We went to the pub yesterday afternoon, me and Jas had a mini row over something unrelated to our sex life, bumped into Steve, he told her he misses her etc they got drunk, we ended up back at ours and not before long, i was watching him fuck Jas like there was no tomorrow. My god do they have chemistry. Im shocked she hasnt fallen for Steve to be honest. They get on like a house on fire and their sex is amazing. I slept on the sofa while he took over my bed for the night.