Our Hotwives

New here, so apologies in advance if this is a duplicate thread.

I find it a constant challenge when my wife and I go to dinner, shooting a few games of pool, or having a couple drinks at a sports bar - that just my presence seems to deter other guys from approaching my wife. We have tried a few approaches such as her wearing an anklet (which is honestly zero value except to us), strictly no PDA, and she regularly will venture to the bar by herself to get a refill instead of waiting on the server. Another approach is simply her going out solo - but my question is specifically around when we are out together.

Curious to know if there are other (realistic) things we can consider to help make her “availability” more visible and transparent? Thanks in advance for input!
-LDR

Do you two go out dancing together?

superb101 wrote: ↑

Sun Jun 18, 2023 6:21 am

Do you two go out dancing together?

Neither of us are really “dancers” and there is a distinct lack of dance clubs in the area (at least that we know of haha).

For us the best things happened when my wife would go into a bar alone, I would come in later to watch from a distance. Her cover was she would be waiting for a friend from work who was running late. As guys chat and dance with her, she can text you to come meet up and be that friend from work, or she can tell you things are going great so keep watching from a distance.

Wantsomefunto wrote: ↑

Sun Jun 18, 2023 6:31 am

For us the best things happened when my wife would go into a bar alone, I would come in later to watch from a distance. Her cover was she would be waiting for a friend from work who was running late. As guys chat and dance with her, she can text you to come meet up and be that friend from work, or she can tell you things are going great so keep watching from a distance.

Fantastic idea, thank you!

For her to be 'available and transparent' she only needs to make eye contact with a guy, smile, and hold eye contact a little longer than normal. Repeat.
Lightly lick her lips, or play with her hair, while holding eye contact. There are so many ways that are as old as sex to be noticed, and it's called flirting .

Farmgirl wrote: ↑

Sun Jun 18, 2023 11:49 am

make eye contact with a guy, smile, and hold eye contact a little longer than normal

Exactly this. Women generally seem to be very well-practiced with giving off the "don't bug me" vibe that is probably necessary for getting on with their lives, without being constantly bothered by men.

Even if she's not naturally shy, it probably requires a bit of conscious thought to turn that off, and give off the "I'm available" vibe instead.

But really, the eye contact is probably all the signal that most men need. From a distance, unavailable women generally don't make deliberate eye contact with strange men for more than about a half-second. Two or three seconds sends a signal. Add a smile to that, and it says "come and talk to me".

File the following under “easier said than done.”

Practice being a flirty couple. Be gregarious and sociable in a group, deliberately make your way though the crowd and talk to people. I’ve found that it’s astonishingly easy to do this with a beautiful woman at my side. I adopt the attitude that I’m the host of this function and that my wife is the guest of honor. My wife gets flirty when I’m being sociable and other men take that as a cue that it’s okay to flirt back. Guys are much more likely to hit on my wife if I’m being fun and outgoing, rather than if I wait silently in a corner for her to wink at some dark stranger.

Again, easier said than done.

iloanmywife wrote: ↑

Mon Jun 19, 2023 7:24 am

File the following under “easier said than done.”

Practice being a flirty couple. Be gregarious and sociable in a group, deliberately make your way though the crowd and talk to people. I’ve found that it’s astonishingly easy to do this with a beautiful woman at my side. I adopt the attitude that I’m the host of this function and that my wife is the guest of honor. My wife gets flirty when I’m being sociable and other men take that as a cue that it’s okay to flirt back. Guys are much more likely to hit on my wife if I’m being fun and outgoing, rather than if I wait silently in a corner for her to wink at some dark stranger.

Again, easier said than done.

It works well for us, but it is something we learned together. A very good extension of my flirting and my Number1 having the attitude you express .

Interesting. My situation is a bit different. My wife gets hit on all the time when we're out. For whatever reason, it doesn't seem to bother them that I'm there. My wife is what you might call a people person. She is very outgoing and friendly to everyone. Maybe that has something to do with it.

Cdncuck wrote: ↑

Tue Jun 20, 2023 8:14 am

Interesting. My situation is a bit different. My wife gets hit on all the time when we're out. For whatever reason, it doesn't seem to bother them that I'm there. My wife is what you might call a people person. She is very outgoing and friendly to everyone. Maybe that has something to do with it.

CC - Would it be fair to say it's like you are in her shadow? And people will go "Oh, CC didn't see you there."

Long Lurker 34 wrote: ↑

Tue Jun 20, 2023 9:21 am

Cdncuck wrote: ↑

Tue Jun 20, 2023 8:14 am

Interesting. My situation is a bit different. My wife gets hit on all the time when we're out. For whatever reason, it doesn't seem to bother them that I'm there. My wife is what you might call a people person. She is very outgoing and friendly to everyone. Maybe that has something to do with it.

CC - Would it be fair to say it's like you are in her shadow? And people will go "Oh, CC didn't see you there."

Never thought about but I guess it's possible. I'm a pretty quiet guy.

Cdncuck wrote: ↑

Tue Jun 20, 2023 11:32 am

Long Lurker 34 wrote: ↑

Tue Jun 20, 2023 9:21 am

Cdncuck wrote: ↑

Tue Jun 20, 2023 8:14 am

Interesting. My situation is a bit different. My wife gets hit on all the time when we're out. For whatever reason, it doesn't seem to bother them that I'm there. My wife is what you might call a people person. She is very outgoing and friendly to everyone. Maybe that has something to do with it.

CC - Would it be fair to say it's like you are in her shadow? And people will go "Oh, CC didn't see you there."

Never thought about but I guess it's possible. I'm a pretty quiet guy.

CC - Not in your situation but it's much the same with my SO who just has a larger personality than me. Of course on the other hand for you, in away it lets you watch her 'work' a room and you can see her interaction with guys up close which can be quite a thrill, if that's something you like.

Long Lurker 34 wrote: ↑

Tue Jun 20, 2023 4:53 pm

Cdncuck wrote: ↑

Tue Jun 20, 2023 11:32 am

Long Lurker 34 wrote: ↑

Tue Jun 20, 2023 9:21 am

Cdncuck wrote: ↑

Tue Jun 20, 2023 8:14 am

Interesting. My situation is a bit different. My wife gets hit on all the time when we're out. For whatever reason, it doesn't seem to bother them that I'm there. My wife is what you might call a people person. She is very outgoing and friendly to everyone. Maybe that has something to do with it.

CC - Would it be fair to say it's like you are in her shadow? And people will go "Oh, CC didn't see you there."

Never thought about but I guess it's possible. I'm a pretty quiet guy.

CC - Not in your situation but it's much the same with my SO who just has a larger personality than me. Of course on the other hand for you, in away it lets you watch her 'work' a room and you can see her interaction with guys up close which can be quite a thrill, if that's something you like.

I very much enjoy watching her "work a room". It is as you say thrilling.

Good point CC and LL, thank you. I would say that between us, she is the extrovert and I am much more the introvert - however, when I say extrovert, that is not to say she is the super outgoing social butterfly and constantly making initial engagements. It would be fair to say, especially in unfamiliar environments, she somewhat vacillates between being outgoing and being more reserved - probably a lot of factors that play into it - I try not to over-analyze it haha.

I will add, I do not hover or lurk if/when there is a potential interest she is flirting with or talking to - I purposefully “disconnect” from the situation so that I don’t unintentionally cause a misperception or awkwardness, which seems to help her focus on what is in front of her easier.

My wife went out drinking and dancing one night with a girlfriend (who was in a long-term relationship of her own. She came home in the wee hours of the morning, leapt onto my back and hoarsely whispered “I’m very, very aroused”. As I quickly woke up, she told me of their adventures flirting with two attractive men. Their flirtation included all of the above, but with my wife and her friend engaging in physical contact caressing arms, stroking shoulders and lightly brushing earlobes. She also happily allowed the contact to be reciprocated, with him putting his hand on her ass and stroking, then high on her thigh as they sat close together. She thought to herself that I would love hearing about all of this. Both women apparently enjoyed their night thoroughly. I know I was enthralled hearing about all of it.

The physical contact she and her girlfriend initiated with these men was particularly exciting for me. And she knew it would be.

itsmagic1954 wrote: ↑

Wed Jun 21, 2023 3:17 pm

My wife went out drinking and dancing one night with a girlfriend (who was in a long-term relationship of her own. She came home in the wee hours of the morning, leapt onto my back and hoarsely whispered “I’m very, very aroused”. As I quickly woke up, she told me of their adventures flirting with two attractive men. Their flirtation included all of the above, but with my wife and her friend engaging in physical contact caressing arms, stroking shoulders and lightly brushing earlobes. She also happily allowed the contact to be reciprocated, with him putting his hand on her ass and stroking, then high on her thigh as they sat close together. She thought to herself that I would love hearing about all of this. Both women apparently enjoyed their night thoroughly. I know I was enthralled hearing about all of it.

The physical contact she and her girlfriend initiated with these men was particularly exciting for me. And she knew it would be.

IM# - So looking back on that evening now, if you had known there was the possibility of this heavy flirtation taking place, would you have encouraged your wife to have gotten this fellow's number?

The two men were only in town for the night, so no phone numbers were exchanged. My wife and her friend kept it on a first name only basis. Even as they went with the men to their hotel room and fucked their brains out.

It was the very first time both she and her girlfriend had sex outside of their primary relationships. My wife had told the friend of my fantasy of her being “willingly available “ during the evening. It must have inspired her friend to have her own extracurricular adventure. My wife said the almost anonymous nature of the sex made it that much hotter, especially as she knew how much I would enjoy hearing about it.

My wife going to a bar by herself or me coming in later to watch works best. I have found the only time we have had conversations together with men is at hotel bars sitting/standing at the bar. Then the wife can decide to flirt or just have a vanilla conversation with the man. For what ever reason hotels bars seem easier.

Just an extra detail about your wife getting the drinks,

When going out to a bar, festival or whatever, my wife is usually going to the bar to get the drinks. She checks out in advance if there's a nice man at the bar and this will be the place for her to order drinks. Now the eye contact thing works even better as they both can say hi to each other right away.

If the conversation goes well and If necessary my wife says something like, I'm here with a friend. What is a real kick for me when I hear about it afterwards.

More common than not is that my wife is turned off by the dumb things the man at bar says to her, it's not always easy for guys when an attractive woman starts a conversation. In our experience it can be fun and disappointing for her to do so but we usually have a laugh about it.

By the way, this topic is great! We really like to hear every big and little skills every body has. The being chatty and open is a good one to!

I think going out to see if someone picks her up is a very very hard thing to accomplish. Why not just go a site like SLS or even advertise on double list?

It is a whole lot easier to expose her to a wide variety of choices that way.

Tryagain wrote: ↑

Sun Mar 24, 2024 7:35 am

I think going out to see if someone picks her up is a very very hard thing to accomplish. Why not just go a site like SLS or even advertise on double list?

It is a whole lot easier to expose her to a wide variety of choices that way.

It's hard to accomplish but much bigger kick for both of us when it works out. She likes being seen in nice outfits, the attention she gets, me watching from a distance, there's a lot of nice details to this endeavor. Much better than an online hookup.

Dutch cuckold wrote: ↑

Sun Mar 24, 2024 10:26 am

Tryagain wrote: ↑

Sun Mar 24, 2024 7:35 am

I think going out to see if someone picks her up is a very very hard thing to accomplish. Why not just go a site like SLS or even advertise on double list?

It is a whole lot easier to expose her to a wide variety of choices that way.

It's hard to accomplish but much bigger kick for both of us when it works out. She likes being seen in nice outfits, the attention she gets, me watching from a distance, there's a lot of nice details to this endeavor. Much better than an online hookup.

DC - I would think the "in person" attention is far more gratifying than being "swiped" etc easily at least tenfold.

Long Lurker 34 wrote: ↑

Sun Mar 24, 2024 10:49 am

Dutch cuckold wrote: ↑

Sun Mar 24, 2024 10:26 am

Tryagain wrote: ↑

Sun Mar 24, 2024 7:35 am

I think going out to see if someone picks her up is a very very hard thing to accomplish. Why not just go a site like SLS or even advertise on double list?

It is a whole lot easier to expose her to a wide variety of choices that way.

It's hard to accomplish but much bigger kick for both of us when it works out. She likes being seen in nice outfits, the attention she gets, me watching from a distance, there's a lot of nice details to this endeavor. Much better than an online hookup.

DC - I would think the "in person" attention is far more gratifying than being "swiped" etc easily at least tenfold.

It is and she sometimes craves it and then we have to go out to a bar or whatever. If she's in a good mood and stays in a good mood because there's nice men, her flair and laughing, the way she touches her hair or dangles her sexy shoes and all the other little details is sometimes quite painful to watch and so I really enjoy it. She can put on quite a show when the setting is right.

Dutch cuckold wrote: ↑

Sun Mar 24, 2024 11:16 am

Long Lurker 34 wrote: ↑

Sun Mar 24, 2024 10:49 am

Dutch cuckold wrote: ↑

Sun Mar 24, 2024 10:26 am

Tryagain wrote: ↑

Sun Mar 24, 2024 7:35 am

I think going out to see if someone picks her up is a very very hard thing to accomplish. Why not just go a site like SLS or even advertise on double list?

It is a whole lot easier to expose her to a wide variety of choices that way.

It's hard to accomplish but much bigger kick for both of us when it works out. She likes being seen in nice outfits, the attention she gets, me watching from a distance, there's a lot of nice details to this endeavor. Much better than an online hookup.

DC - I would think the "in person" attention is far more gratifying than being "swiped" etc easily at least tenfold.

It is and she sometimes craves it and then we have to go out to a bar or whatever. If she's in a good mood and stays in a good mood because there's nice men, her flair and laughing, the way she touches her hair or dangles her sexy shoes and all the other little details is sometimes quite painful to watch and so I really enjoy it. She can put on quite a show when the setting is right.

DC - What about in normal life when she is just going about daily routine things, does she ever get hit on and how does she handle it?