Just Beginning

[bubbajack]

"I want to have fun and experience new things, but only with you”.

What a splendid attitude she is expressing towards fun, and new experiences - and towards you!

However, it does sound pretty abstract to me.

I would be very pleased to know (as I am sure you would) what kinds of sexual activities she might consider to be "fun" and "new" and worth experiencing with you.

Does she ever offer suggestions?

I am definitely NOT implying that she's putting you off - I don't know enough about you or her to jump to that conclusion.

But longterm marriage does seem to benefit from balancing
the spouses' joint and several sexual interests - which, to put it somewhat brutally - may mean catering to one another's peculiar sexual interests at least now and then and at least to some degree.

This is not to say that marriages between people who don't do much of anything - or anything at all - that is sexual together cannot work or cannot be satisfying.

But you two seem to want to "do" sex together - so what alternatives can you and she envision?

[Mlghten]

"I want to have fun and experience new things, but only with you”.

What a splendid attitude she is expressing towards fun, and new experiences - and towards you!

However, it does sound pretty abstract to me.

I would be very pleased to know (as I am sure you would) what kinds of sexual activities she might consider to be "fun" and "new" and worth experiencing with you.

Does she ever offer suggestions?

I am definitely NOT implying that she's putting you off - I don't know enough about you or her to jump to that conclusion.

But longterm marriage does seem to benefit from balancing
the spouses' joint and several sexual interests - which, to put it somewhat brutally - may mean catering to one another's peculiar sexual interests at least now and then and at least to some degree.

This is not to say that marriages between people who don't do much of anything - or anything at all - that is sexual together cannot work or cannot be satisfying.

But you two seem to want to "do" sex together - so what alternatives can you and she envision?

Good observation. Thanks for your take on my post.

I asked her what exactly she means by trying new things sexually with only me. Her explanation was she wants passionate sex with me. She did tell me she also wants to have hot steamy sex but with me. She wants to go out to a club, dance, drink get sweaty and have sex maybe in a more public place. But she says she only wants it with me. BTW - one problem is I’m not big on dancing and she knows it. Haha.

I posed the question, if you want hot nasty sex with just me, why couldn’t - she stopped me and said I know where your going with this and smiled. I said just food for thought. It was a light hearted conversation and we were then interrupted.

We have good communication and my wife knows about my fantasy and she doesn’t get mad when we talk.

Thanks for your input

[Mlghten]

Hope yall are still growing closer .

Thanks Farmgirl. We are so happy with our life together. Of course we have the normal struggles but we are an awesome team. Love following you and tell #1 hello

[Mlghten]

Bump

[mfmseeker1969]

Hope you guys have been having fun sounds like u have been.
Have you posted any pix of this very sexy woman.

[Mlghten]

Bump

[Long Lurker 34]

Bump

Bump in the night we hope. Do tell!

[central]

Bump

Bump in the night we hope. Do tell!

Just read your whole thread. You two have come a long towards her becoming a HW. Kind of a shame it hasn't happened as we all know how much she and you will enjoy it. On page 8, I almost went to the last 2 pages in this thread to read of her continual fun. Looking back, best to look for single confident men. Hope you can get her back on track to fulfilling both of yours and now her fantasies.

She knows she has a green light and support from you, when the opportunity is there, she has proven that SHE IS WILLING!

Some thoughts to get things going again, some have been said here and elsewhere;
The right kind of guy or right guy needs to find her. To be found, she needs to be in places where there opportunities.
Hopefully, she still dresses subtly sexy when out and about.
Places she could be approached that are not usually thought about are grocery stores, malls, other shopping stores, and of course bars / clubs.
Home Depot and Lowes are good places too, I have observed many times men meeting women by offering to help find items.
You don't dance but she does, go to a dance club with her dressed right, guys will ask her to dance.

When you are out anywhere with her, find reasons to leave her by herself for periods of time, so she can be approached. You can start a habit of dropping her off at the front door while you go park towards the back of the lot, and take your time walking to the establishment. This could evolve over time to you telling her as she gets out that she has 5 minutes before you get in there, to find a guy she is attracted to.

She might not have confidence in herself, but many guys find that an attractive trait. They even look for that in a lady.

Reading your thread over, it became very clear that she has changed a lot in 5 years. She obviously loves sex. She enjoys other men flirting with her and giving her attention. She enjoys sexting. She wants to experience another guy. She has your support. All the right ingredients are there.

In her mind, she is Available, Willing and Able. When the right guy shows up, she might even be the one to make the first move.
When it happens, you will be shocked how fast she goes from 0 to 100.

Good luck, hope that helps.

[Mlghten]

Thank you for reading our story. We are currently on a trip just the two of us alone. Which is a first in a long time. Looking forward to relaxing and MAYBE some fun when we go out. Will keep you posted.

[Mlghten]

Bump

[Long Lurker 34]

Bump

M - Good know you are still with us.

[Mlghten]

We are still here but haven’t had any big progress. I’m in this for the long game and staying patient. We had several bouts of life getting in the way over the past year and a half. We are just now getting to better place, where we can start exploring again.

Bump

M - Good know you are still with us.

[Long Lurker 34]

We are still here but haven’t had any big progress. I’m in this for the long game and staying patient. We had several bouts of life getting in the way over the past year and a half. We are just now getting to better place, where we can start exploring again.

Bump

M - Good know you are still with us.

M - You guys Bump along at your own speed and let us know when the 'grind' happens!

[Farmgirl]

We are still here but haven’t had any big progress. I’m in this for the long game and staying patient. We had several bouts of life getting in the way over the past year and a half. We are just now getting to better place, where we can start exploring again.

Bump

M - Good know you are still with us.

M - You guys Bump along at your own speed and let us know when the 'grind' happens!

[Mlghten]

Hello long time friends. Thank you for sticking with us and reading our story. We are actually in a very good place now. My wife and I are so close and communicate about everything. I have to thank this lifestyle for that communication. My wife has not slept with another man yet and I’m not sure she ever will. We are in this together and that decision is solely hers. She knows how I feel and what my desires are and I completely understand where she is at. I can tell all of you that she has not said No, it’s always a maybe or “you never know”. Haha.

Our bedroom play has gone from zero to 100 since we talk about everything. Sometimes fantasy, sometimes real life. Quick story, my wife is closing in on 50 yrs old and i challenged her the other night to place a sexual experience with another man on her bucket list to do before the age of 50. Haha. She liked it and smiled, saying “hummm, will see”.

In the past few weeks she has gotten into watching porn involving swingers. It really intrigues her and she gets really horny watching it. She says she would never do this, and I have no interest in it. We are having a lot of fun and you never know what the future holds.

Take care and thanks for following us.

[Mlghten]

Bump

[Rockhard11]

You mentioned your wife having a sexual bucket list. Is that something you’d consider sharing with us along with some of the completed items to see her progression?

[4herpleasure444]

Have loved your story and the relationship you share. This journey has already taken you to a closeness beyond what most couples experience. You are a lucky man to have her, and I ache for this to happen for you both.

[Mlghten]

Thank you for following our journey. We have definitely become closer in every way. Thank you for following.

Have loved your story and the relationship you share. This journey has already taken you to a closeness beyond what most couples experience. You are a lucky man to have her, and I ache for this to happen for you both.

[Mlghten]

Bump

[Mlghten]

Hello Friends,

It’s been a while since I have posted an update. My wife and I are doing really well. Kids are getting older and we find ourselves with a little more free time together, which is a good thing. We are so happy and ever since we opened our communication, we became so close. My wife hasn’t become a Hotwife yet. We talk about non-monogamy frequently, but, just have not decided to move that direction.

Our biggest hang up is finding someone and it being discrete. This is our secret and we have a lot to loose professionally if it was exposed. It’s a shame that society is like this, but thats the world we live in. The good news is we are having awesome sex and love having sexual fun together. I still have a strong fantasy, but it is not about me. I want my wife to be comfortable and feel safe if we every thanks the next step. For those who have read our story, you can see we have been in a holding pattern for several years. I am okay with this and truly believe this is caused by general life getting in the way. Also, we just have not met the right guy.

I miss this forum and hope to write more often about our current situation.

Thanks
M

[Long Lurker 34]

Hello Friends,

It’s been a while since I have posted an update. My wife and I are doing really well. Kids are getting older and we find ourselves with a little more free time together, which is a good thing. We are so happy and ever since we opened our communication, we became so close. My wife hasn’t become a Hotwife yet. We talk about non-monogamy frequently, but, just have not decided to move that direction.

Our biggest hang up is finding someone and it being discrete. This is our secret and we have a lot to loose professionally if it was exposed. It’s a shame that society is like this, but thats the world we live in. The good news is we are having awesome sex and love having sexual fun together. I still have a strong fantasy, but it is not about me. I want my wife to be comfortable and feel safe if we every thanks the next step. For those who have read our story, you can see we have been in a holding pattern for several years. I am okay with this and truly believe this is caused by general life getting in the way. Also, we just have not met the right guy.

I miss this forum and hope to write more often about our current situation.

Thanks
M

M- Good to see you post again.
As you have decided not to move in the HWing direction, what about sort of pseudoHWing. You and the wife go to a bar (well it doesn't have to be), separately. She is dressed semi sexy at least and open to getting hit on and collecting numbers, with some potential PDA. You take your time "hit" on her and take your prize home.

[Mlghten]

Hello Friends,

It’s been a while since I have posted an update. My wife and I are doing really well. Kids are getting older and we find ourselves with a little more free time together, which is a good thing. We are so happy and ever since we opened our communication, we became so close. My wife hasn’t become a Hotwife yet. We talk about non-monogamy frequently, but, just have not decided to move that direction.

Our biggest hang up is finding someone and it being discrete. This is our secret and we have a lot to loose professionally if it was exposed. It’s a shame that society is like this, but thats the world we live in. The good news is we are having awesome sex and love having sexual fun together. I still have a strong fantasy, but it is not about me. I want my wife to be comfortable and feel safe if we every thanks the next step. For those who have read our story, you can see we have been in a holding pattern for several years. I am okay with this and truly believe this is caused by general life getting in the way. Also, we just have not met the right guy.




I miss this forum and hope to write more often about our current situation.

Thanks
M

M- Good to see you post again.
As you have decided not to move in the HWing direction, what about sort of pseudoHWing. You and the wife go to a bar (well it doesn't have to be), separately. She is dressed semi sexy at least and open to getting hit on and collecting numbers, with some potential PDA. You take your time "hit" on her and take your prize home.

It’s good to be back with my old friends. My wife hasn’t rules Hotwifing out, in fact recently she has been showing more interest. If anyone has ideas on sites to send her to, she says she would like to research it some more. I have thought about trying to get her to this site and become verified. I know there are some really good people on here that may be able to answer her questions.

[Swanilla]

What geographic area are you in?

[Mlghten]

What geographic area are you in?

Midwest