Desire to be cuckolded stems from former lovers cheating?

[options311]

In my case, I was usually not the only significant person in my partner's life at the time. My first true girlfriend cheated on me and got pregnant with her next-door neighbor, a year younger than her. Then, my real first true love, she was separated from her soon-to-be X-husband. I could never tell for sure when he might show up to see the kids and then who knows. The next girlfriend was cheating on me with 2 other guys until we all found out about each other, by then I was tired but thrilled, jealous, intrigued, and frustrated, wondering what they had to offer that my average cock didn't. A few girlfriends later until I got married, each relationship not fully mine. The angst caused additional frustrated anxiety and desire. Cuckold tendencies just seemed to be the trend. So I am always intrigued by such stories and images. A few of them actually taunted me sharing and teasing me into total elevated frustration and excitement.

[TomG]

This is actually the very thing made me want my GF to fuck other guys. As a teenager, my GF cheated on me, and although I was furious with her, I found myself fantasizing about it.

[leggysman]

I suspect this might be part of it, for me.

In my youth, I had a girlfriend, and I was jealous and suspicious of her.

At the end, she probably cheated on me. She definitely lied about staying the night at an ex-boyfriend's house, after a party. I broke up with her the next morning. She later married him.

It was shortly after that, that I began to eroticize the jealousy thing, and in a relationship with a new girlfriend, we tried exploring a hot-GF arrangement. Nothing ended up happening (the main guy she desired was unavailable) but that's when it began for me.

[options311]

Yes TomG & Leggysman. You nailed it just right. I was surprised at how I reacted to what my girlfriend was sharing with me over dinner. Her intent to pleasure our guest if I was going to be late coming home for dinner with him there. Those words took a life of their own, causing me both jealousy and intrigue, finding myself getting very excited at the thought of it all instead of getting angry that she would even suggest this. That's when it dawned on me that this was something I might both hate and desire in the future. And it seemed to play out a few times afterwards in other such suggestive conversations. It all makes sense to me know. I was a Wannabee Cuckold in waiting, willing to stand by while my significant other would explore and enjoy other lovers while I was in tow.

[TomG]

Yes TomG & Leggysman. You nailed it just right. I was surprised at how I reacted to what my girlfriend was sharing with me over dinner. Her intent to pleasure our guest if I was going to be late coming home for dinner with him there. Those words took a life of their own, causing me both jealousy and intrigue, finding myself getting very excited at the thought of it all instead of getting angry that she would even suggest this. That's when it dawned on me that this was something I might both hate and desire in the future. And it seemed to play out a few times afterwards in other such suggestive conversations. It all makes sense to me know. I was a Wannabee Cuckold in waiting, willing to stand by while my significant other would explore and enjoy other lovers while I was in tow.

You know, options311, I think the jealousy plays a large part in it for me, too. The very thought of my GF fucking someone else would make me want her more than ever. Strange, isn't it?

[TomG]

At the end, she probably cheated on me. She definitely lied about staying the night at an ex-boyfriend's house, after a party. I broke up with her the next morning. She later married him.

It was shortly after that, that I began to eroticize the jealousy thing, and in a relationship with a new girlfriend, we tried exploring a hot-GF arrangement. Nothing ended up happening (the main guy she desired was unavailable) but that's when it began for me.

My circumstance is a little different, leggysman, but I understand completely. And I think you've put it succinctly and accurately, especially for me; I've eroticized the jealousy, just as you've done.

[feetuji]

I never think about this, but I was cheated in the past,by another woman, my girlfriend at the time. It was a long time ago and I think it planted the seed on me, without I realizing it.

[Gmor]

I think any hotwife/cuckold relationship that originated from infidelity carries a large weight and increases the risk of it might not succeed. However, I also know from reading others posts and from my own experiences that many cuckold fantasies, if not actual relationships, do start with a cheating wife. This is definitely the case for me.

Im just a Wannabe but from my own marriage and from two other very serious relationships Ive been in where i have been the betrayed partner is where my fantasy started. And although my wife isnt currently a hotwife (and may never be) I have a large 'catalogue' of real life experiences to fuel my fantasies. These including knowing explicit details of the infidelities and in one 'open' relationship which in reality was a cuckold relationship. If anyone else shares this history and/or interest Im happy to trade experiences.

[patw3268]

Dan Savage said half the people he met who liked to be spanked said they liked it "Because they were spanked as kids", the other half? "Because they weren't spanked"

Fundamentally I believe cuckolding is a form of masochism, and about control. Some people use it as a form of controlling past wrongs, like you said to eroticize cheating for example. Some people use it as a way to eroticize fears, "What's the worst thing that could happen to me sexually? Let me eroticize that!"

I also believe that hotwifing, and cuckolding are different, but just happen to be non-monogamy adjacent. I do not like the humiliation. From my perspective, hotwifing is more about voyeurism, than masochism. I've been cheated on, and with a little shame I'll also admit I've cheated. That's a feeling that brings nausea to me, and not any kind of thrill.

So much wisdom in this post. My wife who is reluctant to take the next step fantasizes about voyeurism. I didn’t pick up on that as a potential starting spot …. but even more impressive, I didn’t realize I was projecting pleasure into past events that happened to me that at the time were painful. Seems like I need a trip to a councilor. Thanks for post.

[Michigan1]

For me I think cheating definitely cemented my urges to be cuckolded. I was around 13 years old when I found out about my mother’s affair. She never knew that I knew and I’m not positive that my dad knew. I would not be surprised at all if he was a willing cuckold just based on some other clues that I won’t mention. I only had two girlfriends in high school and both of these girls were very easy. They had been with lots of guys before me but that didn’t bother me. What my problem was that in public I was very confident but behind closed doors with them alone I was terrified. I couldn’t make a move so I waited for them to act and it never happened. These girls were sluts that almost any guy had a chance with but I couldn’t even get hard I was so nervous. I did end up sleeping with both of them but not while we dated. Both encounters were pathetic and embarrassing on my end and I still get aroused thinking about how inadequate I was and most definitely the worst lay of both these girls very high body count.