My wife is getting close to her first affair.

[jguy]

Our friend moved out over a month ago. My wife and I agreed it was not a good thing for our marriage because she felt like she liked him too much. Since then, our life has returned to how it used to be and everything has been good. We never changed our passcode to our house and last night he came in. When the door unlocked, it startled us both. I turned on my nightstand light and it was Ethan. He went over to my wife's side of the bed and started taking off his shirt. My wife started shaking her head and said "We're can't do this." He took off his pants and she said my name. He said "This is between me and her" He got in bed on her side and started kissing her. When he tried to kiss her mouth she turned away so her kissed her neck and nipples and eventually went down on her. She had a blank stare on her face and her head started shaking. Eventually her eyes rolled back and she had an orgasm from this. He came up and kissed her. She didn't kiss him back but she didn't turn away either. She said 'don't', to him, and he slid himself inside of her. I just laid there not knowing what to do. then, I heard her say 'oh.. fuck' and grabbed his head and pulled it into hers and kissed him and put her arms and legs around him and he fucked her. I'm sure it the best sex she had since he moved out. It was quiet this morning and we didn't talk to each other. I'm going to change the code today, but I don't know if my wife will be okay with that. It was hot watching her when she got into it, but I don't know if either of us want that relationship to continue.

[zorro]

Such ambivalence all the way around. Ethan committed what might technically be construed as rape ("she said 'don't', to him, and he slid himself inside of her."). But despite saying no, she allowed him to proceed, pulled his head to hers to kiss him, and wrapped her legs around him so they could fuck.

Ethan seems to carry a lot of negative baggage for both of you, but the intense hotness of the sex can break through both your reservations.

Except for the possible sexual assault, I have been in similar situations that took away my better judgment. Introduce some cuckdom, with your wife dominating you and Ethan domming her, and the sheets no doubt sizzle. Frankly, my better judgment would be to say it is a good thing for Ethan to have moved out and the door combination changed. I would not be comfortable with another male violating my boundaries. But I would not be surprised if Ethan winds up some more in your wife's lovely pussy. She still has a lot of desire for him despite all. And it doesn't sound as though you will stand between them.

The story continues .... We will see how it unfolds.

[superb101]

Change your pass code and then figure things out between the two of you!

[anonymister1948]

Wow - this screams NO CONSENT! (also rude beyond belief)

[jguy]

Thank you, I thought so too. Seems like borderline rape to me, and another thing I didn't care for was that he held her forehead and came in her mouth. Seemed like she was being used like a cheap whore. If he was trying to get her back into having sex with him, I think he went about it the wrong way.
All my wife had to say was that she didn't appreciate him coming in the other night uninvited.

You know, I did enjoy the fun we had with him before, but more so I was glad it was over. I feel like a pussy letting it happen again, but I honestly still don't know what I would do anything differently to stop him.
I want to text him and tell him he can't come in our home whenever he wants and have sex with my wife, but I think it would just provoke him to come over again.
Also, my wife confessed she gave him a key so there's no sense in changing the passcode.

[RetiredSnowbird]

It wouldn’t cost all that much to have a locksmith come out and re-key the lock’s cylinder…that is if you truly don’t want him to enter your home without being invited.

[leggysman]

Yes. Take charge here dude. Change the locks and the passcode. If you two decide to invite him over in the future, that's one thing; it's quite another to passively hope the guy isn't going to waltz into your house at will (again) and fuck your protesting wife right in front of you. Unless that's your thing.

As for the sex, it sounds like it was a "we can't" meaning "we shouldn't but I want to". A bit of the semi-mythical "I'm saying stop, but don't stop". Yes he should have stopped, but it sounds like she didn't really want him to. People who are being assaulted or raped don't grab and kiss their assailants, and have orgasms.

[jguy]

I bought a new lock and changed it out with a new passcode.
Now all I can think about is him fucking my wife.
I love watching him have sex with her and I want to tell her, but I know we will end up back where we were.

[Mr1SexyGILF]

Could you have an open and honest conversation with her, discussing the things you both enjoyed about her affair with Ethan, and the things you did not enjoy?

Maybe you two could agree on a scenario where he could continue fucking her. Maybe you both need a reset with a different man that respects you both.

Mr GILF

[jguy]

It has been hard. I miss watching him take my wife. I think about them doing it all the time now. My wife is actually glad I changed the locks. I want him to come in again, but I don't know how she will react if he does. I told her it was so hot watching you two fuck that night, but she just said 'yeah..'. Now I am considering leaving the door unlocked on a night when he wants to come over. We haven't had sex for a week and she's been asking for it.
Maybe not a good idea, but I can't stop thinking about it.

[RetiredSnowbird]

Hey, pal, this isn’t an easy recommendation to make. There’s a huge amount of experience in this forum that can be quite invaluable to helping a couple with their journey into hotwifing. However…some things go beyond what the people here can recommend. And in your situation I see some very troubling disconnects in your marriage. I really think the two of you need to see a marriage therapist to work things out, that is, if you care about your marriage. There are good and bad therapists…just make sure you find one that is comfortable with open marriages/hotwifing/alternate sexual lifestyles.

Allowing her lover to disregard her and your wishes for him to stay away and not enter your home is almost begging for him to permanently place you on the sidelines. Mind you, you will probably discount or totally ignore what I’m saying, but when you post on this forum you cannot and should not expect everyone here to cheer you on. Hate to put a damper on things, but “I calls ‘em as I sees ‘em.”

[proudhusb217]

You should absolutely not leave the door unlocked for him! Your wife is trying to move on from him. She needs you right now. You should be having sex with her when she asks.

I second the suggestion of getting therapy. You may have fun with other, better guys in the future, but you need to get your marriage back on track first.

[jguy]

I know you are right, but I've waited 9 years trying to get her to be attracted to someone else with no luck, until now. Our relationship is much better now, but she even suggested it yesterday in a joking way that if we don't have sex she is going to have to have Ethan come over again.
Against my better judgement, I did text him and came up with a plan. He wants me to stay in the closet though when he arrives. I'm not allowed to come out regardless. So it sounds like it is going to happen soon.

[Long Lurker 34]

I know you are right, but I've waited 9 years trying to get her to be attracted to someone else with no luck, until now. Our relationship is much better now, but she even suggested it yesterday in a joking way that if we don't have sex she is going to have to have Ethan come over again.
Against my better judgement, I did text him and came up with a plan. He wants me to hide in the closet though when he arrives. Sounds kinda weird, but could be fun. We will see..

JG - Hiding in the closet scenario goes back decades. I recall reading a number of those types of situation in both PH Letters and Variations and other places years ago. Louvred closet doors seem to work the best. Have fun.
If you do attempt this, don't do it on the spur of the moment. Check you have the space to fit, somewhere to sit or kneel, there aren't clothes you are going to get tangled in and make noise with, check sight lines and nothing that is going to make you sneeze and perhaps a bottle of water.

[RetiredSnowbird]

I know you are right, but I've waited 9 years trying to get her to be attracted to someone else with no luck, until now. Our relationship is much better now, but she even suggested it yesterday in a joking way that if we don't have sex she is going to have to have Ethan come over again.
Against my better judgement, I did text him and came up with a plan. He wants me to stay in the closet though when he arrives. I'm not allowed to come out regardless. So it sounds like it is going to happen soon.

Hmmm…“Against your better judgement”. In which case you deserve what you get.

[RetiredSnowbird]

I know you are right, but I've waited 9 years trying to get her to be attracted to someone else with no luck, until now. Our relationship is much better now, but she even suggested it yesterday in a joking way that if we don't have sex she is going to have to have Ethan come over again.
Against my better judgement, I did text him and came up with a plan. He wants me to stay in the closet though when he arrives. I'm not allowed to come out regardless. So it sounds like it is going to happen soon.

Hmmm…“Against my better judgement”. In which case you deserve what you get.

[TheHammer]

I hate to be “preachy”, but you need marriage counseling before proceeding further.

[superb101]

I hate to be “preachy”, but you need marriage counseling before proceeding further.

Exactly! You are making your decisions based on what your "small head" is telling you rather than your "big head". This will not turn out the way you think!

[jguy]

My wife asked me what I thought about having Ethan come over occasionally. I told her it's something I think about all the time. She laughed and said I know you too well. She told me "I know you want him to come over and sleep with me and if that's what you want, then work it out with him. But you just need to know, having another man inside me, kissing me and being that intimate with him will make me very attached to him."

Her telling me this got me so hard, and she knew it. She touched my pants and said "It's ok.. have him come over. I'll do whatever you want"
After this talk, we had the best sex we have had in a month! Very hot!! Maybe it's better just to talk about it and not go through with it.

[wannabecUKold]

Maybe it's better just to talk about it and not go through with it.

Yes but that’s not where you will leave it, is it?

[jguy]

No, I don't think so. We've had great fantasy sex lately, but I want more. My wife and I agreed I should text him. It was a little bit harder than I thought to get him to come over, but maybe this week it will happen again. His stipulation is that he wants me to be out of the room though. I agreed, but I get to set up a video camera to watch later. We will see..

[DavaoMike]

No, I don't think so. We've had great fantasy sex lately, but I want more. My wife and I agreed I should text him. It was a little bit harder than I thought to get him to come over, but maybe this week it will happen again. His stipulation is that he wants me to be out of the room though. I agreed, but I get to set up a video camera to watch later. We will see..

Any updates? Did you text him? Where did this lead?

[54321]

In a successful hotwife relationship, husband and hotwife BOTH get their needs met.
If the third's needs are met too, he will stay around. If not he will leave and you can
find another one.

But THE most important thing is your wife's needs and yours.
What are they?
Are they being met?
If not, what do you need to change to ensure that they are?

54321

[jguy]

I would say both of our needs are getting met. I love to watch him come over and start touching my wife. When I'm around and when I'm not. I like watching her head tilt back to kiss him when he reaches around her from behind and touches her. Watching her breathing heavier as he wins her affection over until she totally gives in to him. I love watching her skinny fingers grab his face and put her tongue in his mouth.

Yes, he did come back and is a big part of our lives. She resisted him for a while, but now she looks forward to the times when he comes back. A lot of time she says she doesn't want to see him anymore, but she just freezes and lets him do whatever until she is going so hard that she can't stop.

I did invite him back a few months ago. They have had romantic times and they have had times where I was locked out of the room listening to her scream. He's had sex with her quite a lot in the last two months and usually it's a lot of fun.

My favorite thing I enjoy is watching her go down on him. It's something she said she would never do but I know when she gets really turned on, she was to taste him. She wraps her lips around his cock and I know she is enjoying it as much as he does.

The most important thing to my wife is my support in her decisions. Sometimes I try to influence them, but we have found a good ground.

[Mr1SexyGILF]

This is wunderful news considering the tumultuous journey you’ve had getting to this point. Please do keep us updated.

Mr GILF