Another man loves my wife

[Max_Devli]

It sounds to me like Brian is firmly friend zoned and that Juli was entertaining you because she respects you too much to shoot you down.

I'm not sure how this can work out for you, but she does sound like a tremendous wife. You're a lucky dude.

+1

Might be time to hang up your spurs about this. Once a guy gets put in the friend zone he almost always stays there. She sounds like a wonderful wife though, and perhaps the door is open for you to pursue this as a lifestyle with others?

[D+D]

It sounds to me like Brian is firmly friend zoned and that Juli was entertaining you because she respects you too much to shoot you down.

I'm not sure how this can work out for you, but she does sound like a tremendous wife. might be a good thing. As for as Brian, does anyone believe that he hasn't fantasized often about fucking your wife? It's still a great possibility if you want it to happen. You need to cultivate this and see what happens.
+1

Might be time to hang up your spurs about this. Once a guy gets put in the friend zone he almost always stays there. She sounds like a wonderful wife though, and perhaps the door is open for you to pursue this as a lifestyle with others?

Dang, I don't see it that way. She didn't say no and as you said, she didn't recoil. She now knows where you stand and you planted a seed. She'll think about it. And Brian, does anyone really believe that he doesn't fantasize about fucking your wife? Cultivate this. Just because they weren't as emotionally involved as you and many of us on here thought doesn't mean a thing. Not a cheerleader, but I think I know how badly you want it. It may yet happen.

[Wookie]

Could be. And hell, even if he is friend zoned there isn't anything that says you can't FWB him.

My point to the friend zone thing was that by this point if she wanted something to happen it would have bubbled to the surface a tad more. She may actually enjoy her non-sexual relationship.

Just my .02, I can totally see the counterpoint to my friend zone comment, but still stand by my initial feel.

[D+D]

Gotcha. you might be right. Hope I am though. Could be great for the three of them.

[Wookie]

I agree. The revelation that he had social contact with a non-Juli female was the best part of that update. Frankly my biggest fear for him was that Brian would become this weird relationship parasite.

[davidm205]

Since you have already shared with your wife the ok part it would probably be much better to "let her" take the reins instead of talking and "pushing" this from your end.

With your wife already communicating the Widow interest this maybe her way of telling you no. OR one night of sex as a one time thing with a clean ending in sight. Might help this happen.

You have planted the seed twice so might be advisable to see
how it grows where it is really about her desires and not feeling pressured by husband which seems to happen a lot with others......,

Women are much difference then men in their thoughts.

Now if she feels envy of the Widow then you might have a big problem.

One night of great sex then your friend pursues the Widow might be a great outcome.

Just some thoughts for your consideration.

[roadrunner]

I've been walking around this planet for quite a while now, and one thing I've noticed is that you can never really be sure! Either way!

[lagercandle2014]

Mark I would recommend that you do nothing more don't say anything to Brian about it being ok with you if they wanted to fuck each other, or what you and Juli have talked about, don't say anything more to Juli you have told her your feelings and set the seeds as others have said and she has listened, now it's time to let Juli think things through and decide what she wants to do don't keep pushing her for what you would like to happen.

I'm sure if she feels she would like to have sex with Brian not just for but for herself whilst you are all away on the valentine trip or at any other time in the future for that matter she will talk with/to you about it first and not do anything behind your back, she has told you and you know how much she loves you and respects your marriage to much to do that to you.

Also can you remember way back in this thread me suggesting that you and Juli could perhaps help Brian your family friend find a new lady perhaps a widow to bring into his life to help him move on from his divorce and you thought it was not your or Juli's position to find him someone for him, looks you were right he is quite capable of finding someone new himself to move on and good for him.

What will be will be as the song/saying goes, you now need to just wait and accept whatever that is and be happy with whatever Juli decides my friend.

Regards and best wishes to you both LC

[co-husband]

Thank you all for your great comments. I find it's difficult in just a few short paragraphs, to convey ALL of the intricate details of this situation and the interactions between myself, my wife and our friend. If you knew Juli like I know Juli, what she said to me on Tuesday is VERY encouraging to me. When she affirmed to me that she and Brian were not as emotionally attached as I thought they might be, I immediately felt that a sexual relationship between them may be even more of a possibility than it would have been had they gotten emotionally close.

And when I told Juli that I would like her to consider letting Brian enjoy a night of sex with her, when she didn't shut that suggestion down it means she is open to the idea. Juli would not come out and say to me..."yes I want to have sex with Brian", but she will think it over in her mind (if she hasn't already) and then come back to me at some point and say something like.."were you serious when you said you wanted me to sleep with Brian?". When that happens we are off to the races lol.

So I am very encouraged by all of this. The thing about Juli is that she is not a prudish wife who has never slept with another man. Yes, she is a typical wife and mom who is well respected by others. No one would suspect that this petite, little woman has had multiple sex partners in her life and most of our friends now don't even know that she was married before (she was married when she was young, and it lasted 3 years. And in those 3 years she was a shared wife!) So Juli is not a novice at extra marital sex. I saw that gleam in her eye when I mentioned letting Brian enjoy a night with a woman in his bed. So I am VERY encouraged.

Thank you again for your comments!

Mark

[Frakkmywife]

Thank you all for your great comments. I find it's difficult in just a few short paragraphs, to convey ALL of the intricate details of this situation and the interactions between myself, my wife and our friend. If you knew Juli like I know Juli, what she said to me on Tuesday is VERY encouraging to me. When she affirmed to me that she and Brian were not as emotionally attached as I thought they might be, I immediately felt that a sexual relationship between them may be even more of a possibility than it would have been had they gotten emotionally close.

And when I told Juli that I would like her to consider letting Brian enjoy a night of sex with her, when she didn't shut that suggestion down it means she is open to the idea. Juli would not come out and say to me..."yes I want to have sex with Brian", but she will think it over in her mind (if she hasn't already) and then come back to me at some point and say something like.."were you serious when you said you wanted me to sleep with Brian?". When that happens we are off to the races lol.

So I am very encouraged by all of this. The thing about Juli is that she is not a prudish wife who has never slept with another man. Yes, she is a typical wife and mom who is well respected by others. No one would suspect that this petite, little woman has had multiple sex partners in her life and most of our friends now don't even know that she was married before (she was married when she was young, and it lasted 3 years. And in those 3 years she was a shared wife!) So Juli is not a novice at extra marital sex. I saw that gleam in her eye when I mentioned letting Brian enjoy a night with a woman in his bed. So I am VERY encouraged.

Thank you again for your comments!




Mark

Thanks for responding here, Mark. All this talk of "friend zone" (which I know all too well, dammit) was making some very valid points and was getting rather discouraging. But you know your wife better than anyone and could see the positive in all this. Thanks for sharing a little of your wife's past. I'm so glad she had this extra marital sexual activity. It'll really help you with your goal here, not to mention it's very hot.

Thanks again for sharing your journey here. I'm totally in your corner and can't wait for Juli to begin her sexual relationship with your friend.

[Wookie]

I wasn't aware that she was previously in an open relationship. So it sounds like you've given her approval, your communication is great, she's experienced, her heart is in the right place... And the ball is in her court. Fingers crossed for you dude.

[bubbajack]

I can hardly express how different the most relevant set of propositions seem today from how they seemed yesterday, now that we know Juli has been part of a shared-wife scenario in the past.

This changes everything!

Among other differences, her firsthand familiarity, not only with the existence of the kink (standard wife sexual self-understanding seems to exclude the possibility of sex with others by agreement ) but also with actually having been shared, in the sense of her former husband enjoying her getting fucked by other men, probably makes the boundaries of her "friend zone" much more porous than they would be ordinarily.

Once the definition of marital sex has been enlarged to include - or at least not exclude - sex with others on an agreed basis, it never really resumes its former narrow dimensions ...

The odds that she will at least want to sample Brian sexually before he goes off with the widow have, to my mind at least, greatly increased!

[co-husband]

Thanks Wookie, Frakkmywife and Bubbajack...

Yes, I guess that's what I meant earlier when I said it's been difficult to share every detail about our situation using the brief posts here, but once you learn more about Juli, things make more sense I believe. I was a bit hesitant to share too much private information just out of discretion concerns, but I will tell you more now about Juli's past experience.

She was married when she was 17 and divorced at 20. After her divorce I started dating her and we were married a year later. Now we've been together over 30 years. Juli's first husband was 6 years older than her and he was an Alpha male personality. She told me enough about her first marriage to know that they did a partner swap with another couple, and her ex also shared her with one male friend. (The man I mentioned in a previous post. I knew the man even back then but I didn't know until just a few years ago that he was the one that Juli was shared with).
When Juli and I married, she was ready by that time to settle down, have babies, a family, job, house etc..so that's what our life has consisted of. Monogomous (as far as I know) sex and a typical housewife. But yes, Juli does have that in her past, so the idea, or suggestion of having sex with a man who isn't her husband, is not as big of a stretch for her as it might be for most wives. Its just not something we've ever discussed until now.

At this stage in our life..mid 50s, empty nesters, she is still smoking hot and has a strong sex drive. Now you can see why I'm so encouraged after our talk this week. By her not saying "no", I know she is likely considering it especially with my "stroke of genius" plan to get them together on a Valentine's Day date including an available hotel room! lol

Mark

[D+D]

I believe Mark, that you shared this info about Julie ' s past in previous posts. I know that I didn't dream it. But I remember all that you've just repeated. I think you're in a good position as I have already stated and I see no reason to mark this off now. I enjoy my wife being a hotwife and I'm sure you will too. Until you told her she didn't know that though. Bet her sweet little mind has been busy pondering this the last few days.

[Wookie]

It kind of makes sense too. She seemingly ended that part of her life atleast partially due to starting a family. Now that she has an empty nest it would likely warrant revisiting the idea at a minimum.

[lagercandle2014]

You are right D+D Mark did indeed share this information with us in previous posts, so to all who say they did not know or realise this, may I suggest you read the whole post now or again if you think you already had, so you fully understand as much as you can from Marks dialogues and give you a better insight on how we think he feels.

I am staggered to think people do not read the whole post before making a comment or judgements.

Mark I don't know how this must make you feel to learn this and to have to keep repeating yourself.

Regards my friend LC

[bubbajack]

You are right D+D Mark did indeed share this information with us in previous posts, so to all who say they did not know or realise this, may I suggest you read the whole post now or again if you think you already had, so you fully understand as much as you can from Marks dialogues and give you a better insight on how we think he feels.

I am staggered to think people do not read the whole post before making a comment or judgements.

Mark I don't know how this must make you feel to learn this and to have to keep repeating yourself.

Regards my friend LC

Chill, man - these stories comes out sequentially and with different factors assuming different grades of relevance at different times ... can't a person have read the whole thing and have remembered some things more clearly than others?

Scolded for faulty memory on a hotwifing forum?

Sheesh!

[ericsacto]

Did Juli enjoy the shared sex with her first husband? Since he was an alpha male, maybe she only did it to make him happy.

[lagercandle2014]

Bubbajack wrote:
Chill, man - these stories comes out sequentially and with different factors assuming different grades of relevance at different times ... can't a person have read the whole thing and have remembered some things more clearly than others?

Scolded for faulty memory on a hotwifing forum?

Sheesh!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Maby your memory loss is because you make so many comments on so many different threads and you just get mixed up with what's been said with what thread.

One reason I don't post on to many threads here although on many occasions I would like to, just don't want to get mixed up.

BTW I'm quite chilled man.

Regards LC

[co-husband]

Hi..it's really no problem at all. I just appreciate ALL comments from you who have more experience at this than me. You really have helped me a lot. Thanks for that!

To answer ericsacto...Juli has always been careful I think to not show too much enthusiasm around me when talking about her first husband. She is a very kind woman and doesn't want to hurt my feelings, especially because I was not sexually experienced when I married her. I do believe that she really enjoyed that part of her life. She was young and still exploring her sexuality. Her first husband being older than her and an Alpha was I suppose the ideal person for her to explore with. She had many of her sexual firsts with him.
But she has been reluctant to talk about too many details just for the reason I mentioned. I have learned many of those details of her past sex but it has been a process that has taken years. I've asked questions and she has eventually answered them honestly. I know names of previous lovers, where the sex happened, things like that. But it hasn't been something that Juli has volunteered too often, but she has told me a lot about her past sex because i keep asking.

You all know very well how intense it is for a husband to know that other men have shared that level of sexual intimacy with you wife, even if it was before you married her. For me personally, I've had that mixed bag of jealousy, humiliation, excitement and arousal from knowing Juli's past. Making love to her, I have many times thought in my mind how many other men have already had the view of her that I now have. Seeing that beautiful body lying under me and her face glowing from the sex. Knowing other men have been there with her is awesome!

Mark

[D+D]

One of the greatest joys of having a hot wife, to think of the other men who have had her and have seen her in ecstasy.

[bubbajack]

Years ago I knew a guy who was then going with the woman who later became MrsBubba - I then knew of her only as a cute blonde girl with big tits who was sort of new to the shifting group of acquaintances. I was "involved" with another or others at the time - not sure any more exactly who ...

One cold Chicago afternoon I saw him on the street and he told me he was off to get some "tender loving care". The events which I then took it were about to ensue - presumably involving his cock and my eventual wife's mouth and sweet pussy - I later reclaimed from storage and assigned my own personal erotic significance to. These putative happenings remain part of the furniture of my imagination, which I can have recourse to whenever I wish.

Any actual event which took place that day (if it ever did - which I insist it must have) is not one which my wife remembers specifically - she was fucking him and occasionally others during that time and she doesn't really remember that day, although she does remember his cock, which was, she says, "very nice".

I think this shows that the hold which our hotwives' "pre-us" sex history has on our imaginations is so powerful, that even only sort-of wife-sex stuff that we knew and didn't care anything about when it was actually going on, can get hauled up later and generate erotic thrills for our weird libidos.

I mean, this is DOUBLE "ex post fuckto" - having taken place, if at all, in her past and in my then entirely separate past at a time when we shared no joint past or present, but only a then wholly-unguessed-at future.

Yeah, I 've got the kink, all right.

[co-husband]

Yes I know exactly how you both feel.
When Juli was married to her first husband, I actually became friends with them both during that time and even spent the night at their house twice. There was no sex between me and them, I slept in the guest bedroom. But I can still vividly remember seeing Juli go with him into THEIR bedroom and close the door for the night. At the time of course I thought nothing of it because she was his wife, but now I think back on that and realize I actually watched Juli go into a bedroom with another man for the night. I've used that very real memory many times recently and enjoy and appreciate it much more now than I did when it actually happened over 30 years ago.

Mark

[D+D]

I don't know why exactly, that as we grow older, this becomes important, in a good way, to some of us, but it does. I know how badly that you want to experience that episode again, this time with her as your wife. I know because I'm the same way. I wouldn't say this if I didn't believe that you and Julie are rock solid, but I sincerely hope that it happens for you. It has for me.

[co-husband]

Thanks D+D....It's nice to talk with other husbands who feel the same way I do.
You're right that it's hard to explain why this is makes us so aroused but it does. It seems to me that the difference between Alphas and cuckolds, is the Alpha gets his sexual energy from using the body of other men's wives, and we cuckolds get our sexual energy from letting Alphas use our wives. (or used our wife in the past).

I feel even more confident now that I will get to experience what you and others already know. Yesterday Juli asked me (just as I predicted she would),..."Were you serious about letting Brian sleep with me?" I just KNEW that if she ever decided to go through with it, that this is how she would bring it up to me. And sure enough she asked me. I immediately said "YES". I gave my usual reasoning that I felt sorry for Brian being alone, and I also added that she is so beautiful and I am proud of her and it would arouse me greatly to let Brian experience what I do. Then she asked me if I was doing this because I wanted to sleep with other women. (Thanks to all of you in this forum, I was prepared for that question). I adamantly told her no, that I was not wanting to sleep with any other women, but that I was actually just wanting her to let Brian enjoy alone time with her.

I asked her if she had talked to Brian about it yet and she said that she hadn't, but that he has been more "giddy" around her lately, so we both think that he has come to the obvious conclusion that by inviting him to join us for a romantic Valentine get-away, he probably is expecting or at least hoping that there will be more than dinner.

So it does look like it is going to happen and Juli is on board with it. I guess I'm not totally surprised because of her past experience in her first marriage. Only that time she did it because her ex husband wanted it. This time, while I do want it, she is the one making the decision and will be doing it because SHE wants to.

Mark